While attending a private training session for Renegade only trainers over the weekend in Nyack, New York I stumbled upon several great experiences worthy of putting to pen. Yes, a few of them involve actual training. And yes I will write about them later in the week, but for those familiar with Renegade know it is not at all about the weight room but about style. Now style can be construed as what you wear, how you walk, how you talk, but also in how you eat. You will be hard pressed to find an out of shape, obese, Renegade practitioner, but unlike most “in shape” members of the gym we do not exist on “Engineered Protein Shakes” or cans of tuna, we know how to eat and that is where The Cousin Ralph comes in.
Setting; Main Street Nyack, New York.
Old School Italian Deli (the kind that has been purged from my neck of the woods by Subway, and only broken English is spoken)
The Sandwich aka The Cousin Ralph: Prosciutto Ham, Broccoli Rabe, Eggplant, Provolone, on Ciabatta, heated.
The Desert: Giant chocolate chip cookie with a hint of cinnamon.
Now that is eating folks!
Does your training/trainer have style? Maybe he or she should. Close to Delaware? Need training? I got style
Monday, November 17, 2008
Monday, November 10, 2008
Sport or Spoiled?
So there I am watching Sunday Night Football in the presence of all females. Blessing or Curse, I ask? I would not necessarily say either. I would, however, say it was a test of patience, my patience, which is now exhausted. Throughout the night I was inundated with questions. Why this, why that. Rules and plays I just take for granted were constantly questioned. Now these women have all watched football before, most have even been to games, but without the presence of other men it was open season.
Keep in mind this the Giants vs. the Eagles so you know it is going to be a crazy game and the observations of the female looked to be equally as crazy. Aside from the typical questions such as; if time runs out while the runner is running down the field and he scores what happens with the extra point? Why would they wear white while playing on grass? there were some very fascinating points.
Here we go with some highlights…..
The camera zooms in on the quarterback. He is wearing these enormous glove/mittens.
“What are they for?” Try explaining that when the temperature is 50 degrees.
The camera zooms in on a defensive lineman. He has two sets of gloves and enough athletic tape to stock any sporting goods store for a year. Just imagine the comments on that one.
It gets really good when the camera shows the quarterback warming up, and he has a trainer next to him catching the ball. “He has someone catch the ball for him? Why?” They ask.
A timeout is called and the cameral shows the crew running out and then the players cleaning their cleats with a cleat cleaner. Now I am starting to laugh along too.
A camera shot showing the water boy making his rounds. “You mean they have someone bringing the Gatorade? Can’t they get it themselves? He is right next to the table.”
“You mean even the bench they are sitting on is heated?”
“They have headsets in their helmets? Who are they talking too? Why?”
“He makes how much? For this?”
This list goes on, and one. I do not think any of the women were overly impressed and I heard the word spoiled mentioned far too often. It kind of makes you wonder, even drugs and criminal activities aside; is your sport still sporting?
Keep in mind this the Giants vs. the Eagles so you know it is going to be a crazy game and the observations of the female looked to be equally as crazy. Aside from the typical questions such as; if time runs out while the runner is running down the field and he scores what happens with the extra point? Why would they wear white while playing on grass? there were some very fascinating points.
Here we go with some highlights…..
The camera zooms in on the quarterback. He is wearing these enormous glove/mittens.
“What are they for?” Try explaining that when the temperature is 50 degrees.
The camera zooms in on a defensive lineman. He has two sets of gloves and enough athletic tape to stock any sporting goods store for a year. Just imagine the comments on that one.
It gets really good when the camera shows the quarterback warming up, and he has a trainer next to him catching the ball. “He has someone catch the ball for him? Why?” They ask.
A timeout is called and the cameral shows the crew running out and then the players cleaning their cleats with a cleat cleaner. Now I am starting to laugh along too.
A camera shot showing the water boy making his rounds. “You mean they have someone bringing the Gatorade? Can’t they get it themselves? He is right next to the table.”
“You mean even the bench they are sitting on is heated?”
“They have headsets in their helmets? Who are they talking too? Why?”
“He makes how much? For this?”
This list goes on, and one. I do not think any of the women were overly impressed and I heard the word spoiled mentioned far too often. It kind of makes you wonder, even drugs and criminal activities aside; is your sport still sporting?
Monday, June 30, 2008
In the spotlight
"If you are what you say you are, a superstarThen have no fear, the crowd is here
And the lights are on
And they wanna show oh oh oh oh, yeah."
Shame-less plug here. Check it out I made this month's superstar spotlight. Yes you heard it right, I am now a superstar, lol.
Forgive the picture and the lyrics.
http://ecwaprowrestling.com/
or
http://ecwaprowrestling.com/main/superspotlight/ss-jjcrewguy-06-2008.html
Tuesday, June 10, 2008
JJ's Law
JJ’s Law
You’ve heard of Murphy’s Law, well JJ’s Law states that if JJ plan’s to re-roof his house one of two things is going to happen.
Rain
Excessive heat wave
Luckily we had no rain, but a Bermuda High came screaming in just after I already ordered my materials and set up a delivery date. I can not remember when we had such intense humidity and heat in the month of June, but in a way I welcomed it. Look, you are talking about a guy who started laying blacktop at 15 in 100 degree weather. Yeah, I am sick and twisted in that respect.
Roofing in high humidity 90 degree + heat would be a good test of my conditioning and of my Renegade training to date. Here we have GPP, weighted GPP, strength work, flexibility, speed work and just plain will power all wrapped in a single workout atop an unstable environment.
You want a functional workout, try roofing.
What did I learn?
Bundles of shingles are far heavier than any loaded barbell.
Bundles up a ladder will waste your legs far better than squats.
Nail guns are awesome as are shingle rippers.
Use staples to affix tar paper, not roofing nails as did the builder in this case.
Cotton Shirts rule, blends suck!
My friend Dave is a true friend, those that did not show have been bumped to acquaintance status.
I am a machine and have no equal when it comes to work ethic in my neighborhood!
My neighbor is a wuss. He cuts his grass at 7 am and then flees inside an air conditioned house for the rest of the day.
Having a broken ac in the house after roofing all day sucks big time. I almost pulled an Al Bundy and camped out in the supermarket freezer section.
Roofing is not hard, just labor intensive.
Did I mention Cotton Shirts rule, blends suck?
Wear sneakers, not boots during the day.
I really wish I owned a pool!
I can’t be killed!
You’ve heard of Murphy’s Law, well JJ’s Law states that if JJ plan’s to re-roof his house one of two things is going to happen.
Rain
Excessive heat wave
Luckily we had no rain, but a Bermuda High came screaming in just after I already ordered my materials and set up a delivery date. I can not remember when we had such intense humidity and heat in the month of June, but in a way I welcomed it. Look, you are talking about a guy who started laying blacktop at 15 in 100 degree weather. Yeah, I am sick and twisted in that respect.
Roofing in high humidity 90 degree + heat would be a good test of my conditioning and of my Renegade training to date. Here we have GPP, weighted GPP, strength work, flexibility, speed work and just plain will power all wrapped in a single workout atop an unstable environment.
You want a functional workout, try roofing.
What did I learn?
Bundles of shingles are far heavier than any loaded barbell.
Bundles up a ladder will waste your legs far better than squats.
Nail guns are awesome as are shingle rippers.
Use staples to affix tar paper, not roofing nails as did the builder in this case.
Cotton Shirts rule, blends suck!
My friend Dave is a true friend, those that did not show have been bumped to acquaintance status.
I am a machine and have no equal when it comes to work ethic in my neighborhood!
My neighbor is a wuss. He cuts his grass at 7 am and then flees inside an air conditioned house for the rest of the day.
Having a broken ac in the house after roofing all day sucks big time. I almost pulled an Al Bundy and camped out in the supermarket freezer section.
Roofing is not hard, just labor intensive.
Did I mention Cotton Shirts rule, blends suck?
Wear sneakers, not boots during the day.
I really wish I owned a pool!
I can’t be killed!
Wednesday, May 14, 2008
Art of Balance
I see you have returned Grasshopper. I have given you extra time to complete your assignment. How did you do?
Find any negative patterns?
What weaknesses did you uncover?
What have you done to correct your imbalances?
For myself I have uncovered a few weaknesses in the kinetic chain that need to be addressed. Luckily, or unluckily depending on your view, my active participation in sports, both contact and non contact, combined with the ballistic nature of Renegade workouts allow weakness to be readily apparent. Starting today I have turned my focus in strengthening the T-8, T-9 region of the back (middle, upper) along with a need to address areas around the first rib and transition points of the neck. To strengthen these areas I will add in a few isolation exercises to compliment my compound movements. For example: on days that I do not include jump shrugs in my workouts I will include another version of shrugs done at a prehab rep range of 12. I also plan on doing isometric neck movements daily with plans to slowly incorporate weighted flexion movements. To target the upper/middle back region I will insure my workouts include one or more of the following: pull-ups, chin-ups, rope climbing, heavy bag work, and/or bent over rows. All work will of course be done with Perfect Posture. As with any weakness or injury I am prepared for a minor set back now and then. Look at re-habing or strengthening your weaknesses like walking. Two steps forward, one back. Three steps forward, one back. Four steps forward….you get the point. Don’t get discouraged or expect an overnight miracle. Just keep a positive attitude and keep at it and your Art of Balance shall proceed stroke by stroke.
Easy, right Grasshopper? Now what is your excuse?
Ahh Grasshopper, are you ready for step 3 towards the Ultimate Handstand?
I knew you were. Lets pick up at the end of step 2 and resume the wall balance handstand position. This time I want you to ease your legs back so only your toes are in contact with the wall. Feel it in the arms and hands? Look at those wrists working, beautiful. Now take one foot completely off the wall, but be sure to keep the knee locked and outstretched. Got it? Can you take the other foot away from the wall now too? Practice this Art of Balance daily and I will return next week for step 4.
Find any negative patterns?
What weaknesses did you uncover?
What have you done to correct your imbalances?
For myself I have uncovered a few weaknesses in the kinetic chain that need to be addressed. Luckily, or unluckily depending on your view, my active participation in sports, both contact and non contact, combined with the ballistic nature of Renegade workouts allow weakness to be readily apparent. Starting today I have turned my focus in strengthening the T-8, T-9 region of the back (middle, upper) along with a need to address areas around the first rib and transition points of the neck. To strengthen these areas I will add in a few isolation exercises to compliment my compound movements. For example: on days that I do not include jump shrugs in my workouts I will include another version of shrugs done at a prehab rep range of 12. I also plan on doing isometric neck movements daily with plans to slowly incorporate weighted flexion movements. To target the upper/middle back region I will insure my workouts include one or more of the following: pull-ups, chin-ups, rope climbing, heavy bag work, and/or bent over rows. All work will of course be done with Perfect Posture. As with any weakness or injury I am prepared for a minor set back now and then. Look at re-habing or strengthening your weaknesses like walking. Two steps forward, one back. Three steps forward, one back. Four steps forward….you get the point. Don’t get discouraged or expect an overnight miracle. Just keep a positive attitude and keep at it and your Art of Balance shall proceed stroke by stroke.
Easy, right Grasshopper? Now what is your excuse?
Ahh Grasshopper, are you ready for step 3 towards the Ultimate Handstand?
I knew you were. Lets pick up at the end of step 2 and resume the wall balance handstand position. This time I want you to ease your legs back so only your toes are in contact with the wall. Feel it in the arms and hands? Look at those wrists working, beautiful. Now take one foot completely off the wall, but be sure to keep the knee locked and outstretched. Got it? Can you take the other foot away from the wall now too? Practice this Art of Balance daily and I will return next week for step 4.
Thursday, May 1, 2008
Perfect Posture
Perfect Posture, it is a term you hear often in Renegade Training. So important is this component to training and everyday life that it is included within the coveted Renegade Concepts of Training. Next time you are walking around the park, or in the gym take a hard look at the people around you. Are they performing their target activities and tasks with perfect posture? Is that buff dude in front of the mirror curling a bar with 45’s doing it the way it was meant too? Is that lady with weights in her hands as she does laps around the track slouching?Yeah, big deal you might say. Well it is a big deal and I am going to tell you why. What happens when you do not adhere to perfect posture is you develop negative patterns. These negative patterns work, over time, to erode your natural patterns of movement. When this happens injury is just a movement away.
Now by reading some of my blogs and seeing I am a Sr. Renegade Trainer you may believe I am infallible. Well let me assure you I am not infallible nor am I immortal. Like most successful people I continue to learn and evolve with every passing day. Every so often I get a not so gentle reminder on the lessons of Perfect Posture, and the need for Balance. (By balance, I do not mean standing atop a swiss ball or a surfboard, but rather a balance among musculature.)
Several years ago I was involved in quite a devastating car wreck that saw injuries to my back and neck. I have spent five years thus far re-habilitating these injuries and will no doubt spend the rest of my life addressing these concerns. The problem is, because of the injury, I have several imbalances. Many of the imbalances I have corrected in my training, yet a few are being very stubborn. I am fully aware of these imbalances which affect my posture. I address them regularly, but every so often the body reminds me that these imbalances need to be addressed a little more attentively than other areas. Unfortunately I see in my business many of these imbalances or negative patterns arising due to poor posture and not necessarily a car wreck or other unavoidable injury. This must not be allowed!
So listen up Grasshopper, we will return to the “Ultimate Handstand” next week. For this week I want you to join me in re-evaluating your training and look for possible imbalances, negative patterns, or poor posture. To Excel you must adhere to the following:
1. You must not allow imbalances or negative patterns to form.
2. You must have perfect posture at all times.
3. You must continually set aside your ego and search for any imbalances no matter your skill level.
4. Continually work to perfect your posture in all areas of life.
5. Address any weaknesses, imbalances, or postural concerns IMMEDIATELY!
6. If by chance you do get injured; seek professional help, relax, take a step back and search for the cause. Pretend you are a detective and find the culprit, or culprits. Work to eliminate the apparent weakness.
7. Most importantly, and this is the hardest, be patient! Correcting any imbalances, postural concerns, or recovering from injury may take days, months, or even years. But it must be done.
8. Don’t ever quit or surrender.
Jump to it Grasshopper.
Thursday, April 17, 2008
ADAPTATION
“Adapting is knowing when to act and when to rest.
It is a peaceful, accepting frame of mind willing to adjust to the existing circumstances.” I Ching #17
Adaptation is necessary both in training and in life. This is an important lesson Grasshopper so pay attention! Most individuals fear change. I admit I hate change. However if you were paying close attention Grasshopper, I said “hate” not “fear” the difference is quite obvious. As we have seen throughout history those that fail to adapt perish, or worse return to levels far below even mediocrity.
From an exercise standpoint all too often I will run across a former competitor, friend, or just plain acquaintances. While in days past they appeared to flourish and excel above others, somehow they have allowed themselves to be pushed off the proverbial mountain top. Amusingly they still strive for their excellence of the past in familiar redundant and repetitive manners. Put simply, they refuse to change. I do not have enough fingers to count the number of acquaintances in the gym that have developed repetitive stress injuries or extremely poor posture because of an unwillingness to change. Instead of heeding my advice and developing an exercise routine that is more organic in nature they often chose a darker path or simply quit the game altogether. They perish.
In wrestling adaptation is a must if you wish to have any longevity or success. At any given performance you must be able to make adjustments in your strategy, approach, execution, and even attitude. You MUST be able and willing to adapt because of the unpredictable dynamics of the sport. Though knowing this many wrestlers still fail to adapt and thus perish.
In life one must continually adapt to the ever constant changes of society. You need to continually learn new skills, open yourself to advancements in technology, and adjust to the economics of the day. If something out of the ordinary happens at work, school, or play, become flexible and quietly adapt. Consider this an opportunity to climb a little higher towards the mountain top.
Adaptation is why I am a winner. It is why I succeed in whatever endeavors I choose. Adaptation is what allowed me to return to wrestling. Adaptation is why I can compete with athletes of any age. Adaption is what brought me to writing this blog. A good example of adaption in life came the other week when I released the JJcrewguy School Cool Van back into the wild. You can not find a cooler van, short wheel base, full time 4x4, 1-ton, windowless, old school 1979 Dodge van, what more could you want? This is the ultimate surfing rig and the ultimate in cool. This machine had Crewguy written all over it as I went through great pains to find it and spent a lot of time and money to restore it. However, with the price of gas skyrocketing along with insurance premiums, and vehicle registration fees I saw the writing on the wall. Though I hated to part with it I recognized the need to adapt and change with the times. I did not fear change.
Now I know what your asking yourself; “JJ with oil being a finite commodity does this mean you are also going to release the Jeep back in the wild?” For that answer you have to stay tuned for deliberate and slow cultivation, Grasshopper, is the path to success and good fortune. And well lets just say I still have some adapting to do.
It is a peaceful, accepting frame of mind willing to adjust to the existing circumstances.” I Ching #17
Adaptation is necessary both in training and in life. This is an important lesson Grasshopper so pay attention! Most individuals fear change. I admit I hate change. However if you were paying close attention Grasshopper, I said “hate” not “fear” the difference is quite obvious. As we have seen throughout history those that fail to adapt perish, or worse return to levels far below even mediocrity.
From an exercise standpoint all too often I will run across a former competitor, friend, or just plain acquaintances. While in days past they appeared to flourish and excel above others, somehow they have allowed themselves to be pushed off the proverbial mountain top. Amusingly they still strive for their excellence of the past in familiar redundant and repetitive manners. Put simply, they refuse to change. I do not have enough fingers to count the number of acquaintances in the gym that have developed repetitive stress injuries or extremely poor posture because of an unwillingness to change. Instead of heeding my advice and developing an exercise routine that is more organic in nature they often chose a darker path or simply quit the game altogether. They perish.
In wrestling adaptation is a must if you wish to have any longevity or success. At any given performance you must be able to make adjustments in your strategy, approach, execution, and even attitude. You MUST be able and willing to adapt because of the unpredictable dynamics of the sport. Though knowing this many wrestlers still fail to adapt and thus perish.
In life one must continually adapt to the ever constant changes of society. You need to continually learn new skills, open yourself to advancements in technology, and adjust to the economics of the day. If something out of the ordinary happens at work, school, or play, become flexible and quietly adapt. Consider this an opportunity to climb a little higher towards the mountain top.
Adaptation is why I am a winner. It is why I succeed in whatever endeavors I choose. Adaptation is what allowed me to return to wrestling. Adaptation is why I can compete with athletes of any age. Adaption is what brought me to writing this blog. A good example of adaption in life came the other week when I released the JJcrewguy School Cool Van back into the wild. You can not find a cooler van, short wheel base, full time 4x4, 1-ton, windowless, old school 1979 Dodge van, what more could you want? This is the ultimate surfing rig and the ultimate in cool. This machine had Crewguy written all over it as I went through great pains to find it and spent a lot of time and money to restore it. However, with the price of gas skyrocketing along with insurance premiums, and vehicle registration fees I saw the writing on the wall. Though I hated to part with it I recognized the need to adapt and change with the times. I did not fear change.
Now I know what your asking yourself; “JJ with oil being a finite commodity does this mean you are also going to release the Jeep back in the wild?” For that answer you have to stay tuned for deliberate and slow cultivation, Grasshopper, is the path to success and good fortune. And well lets just say I still have some adapting to do.
Fair well Old School Cool, you will be missed.
Tuesday, April 8, 2008
Am I not supposed to cheat?
Did the NFL commissioner reverse any of the Patriot’s victories after discovering their cheating ways?
Did Baseball reverse any of the games won by infected blood?
Did Warner Bros make Cecil Turtle give back the $10 he won beating bugs under questionable circumstances?
Did Baseball reverse any of the games won by infected blood?
Did Warner Bros make Cecil Turtle give back the $10 he won beating bugs under questionable circumstances?
Of course not!
Should I go on? Do you really want me too? It is rather depressing. Golf, swimming, Nascar, MMA, Boxing, Roadrunner & Wile E…….
I will stop there as I am depressing myself.
My question for this blog is if the Idols of millions can get away with cheating why can’t I? After all I am a professional athlete.
Doesn’t this mean I am obligated to cheat?
Doesn’t it mean I have a free pass to cheat?
So why then did my recent victory in the ring get reversed well after the referee made his decision and rose my hand?
By being a professional athlete are my cheating ways restricted to drugs, sex scandals, gambling problems, or skeletons released from a closet somewhere?
Obviously it appears so.
I guess I thought cheating, well any kind of cheating was acceptable. I guess I thought wrong. And yes, one time I thought I farted and actually...well you know the rest.
Here is the scenario, you tell me:
For ten minutes my partner and I battled the team of the Heavyweights. Clearly we had the upper hand and were dominating this team comprised of one pencil necked geek and an undersized string bean (thanks Magnum). Wanting to put an end to the match I grasp all 120lbs of String Bean in a Fisherman’s Suplex (also called Perfectplex) and drive him into the mat. Still holding onto to what little frame a string bean has I bridge up for the pin. One, two…. Wham! “What the,,,,?”
Pencil Neck is on top of me driving fists into my stomach, successfully breaking up the count.
Obviously, I suppose, if you are pretty boy this type of cheating is acceptable. The ref thinks so. Of course I insist that he gets back to the corner so I can try pinning String Bean again. The next thing I know someone throws a cane in the ring and it lands in my hands. The ref turns and sees me with the cane, which I am just holding as I am a little confused as to how it got their. I give the cane to ref quite freely and return to pinning String Bean. One, two, three. (Yes my suplexes are that deadly.)
“The winners by pin fall Leather and Lace” the ref announces. Done, another victory, another notch upwards to a title shot.
“Hold it, hold it!” Shouts the new owner of ECWA as he approaches the ring. Here he has spotted someone in the crowd with a video camera and asks to borrow it. On the big screen he shows the cane in my hands, the ref taking it away, and this is where it gets weird. Somehow that video guy photo shopped the image of my partner climbing in the ring and another cane being thrown in the ring. It also shows my partner, Hot Shot Mike Reed, whacking the skull of String Bean with it. Of course the owner reverses the decision as I am not one of those pretty boys.
Even if this was not a doctored video, come on! My team loses on account of a this? Our title shot delayed because of this? How is this not biased? Is this not acceptable behavior in professional sports?
Politics, bah!
I can not wait to make it to the Big Leagues where this type of travesty would never happen. It would be accepted and I made into a hero! I would probably even get a contract extension and bonus out of it too.
Should I go on? Do you really want me too? It is rather depressing. Golf, swimming, Nascar, MMA, Boxing, Roadrunner & Wile E…….
I will stop there as I am depressing myself.
My question for this blog is if the Idols of millions can get away with cheating why can’t I? After all I am a professional athlete.
Doesn’t this mean I am obligated to cheat?
Doesn’t it mean I have a free pass to cheat?
So why then did my recent victory in the ring get reversed well after the referee made his decision and rose my hand?
By being a professional athlete are my cheating ways restricted to drugs, sex scandals, gambling problems, or skeletons released from a closet somewhere?
Obviously it appears so.
I guess I thought cheating, well any kind of cheating was acceptable. I guess I thought wrong. And yes, one time I thought I farted and actually...well you know the rest.
Here is the scenario, you tell me:
For ten minutes my partner and I battled the team of the Heavyweights. Clearly we had the upper hand and were dominating this team comprised of one pencil necked geek and an undersized string bean (thanks Magnum). Wanting to put an end to the match I grasp all 120lbs of String Bean in a Fisherman’s Suplex (also called Perfectplex) and drive him into the mat. Still holding onto to what little frame a string bean has I bridge up for the pin. One, two…. Wham! “What the,,,,?”
Pencil Neck is on top of me driving fists into my stomach, successfully breaking up the count.
Obviously, I suppose, if you are pretty boy this type of cheating is acceptable. The ref thinks so. Of course I insist that he gets back to the corner so I can try pinning String Bean again. The next thing I know someone throws a cane in the ring and it lands in my hands. The ref turns and sees me with the cane, which I am just holding as I am a little confused as to how it got their. I give the cane to ref quite freely and return to pinning String Bean. One, two, three. (Yes my suplexes are that deadly.)
“The winners by pin fall Leather and Lace” the ref announces. Done, another victory, another notch upwards to a title shot.
“Hold it, hold it!” Shouts the new owner of ECWA as he approaches the ring. Here he has spotted someone in the crowd with a video camera and asks to borrow it. On the big screen he shows the cane in my hands, the ref taking it away, and this is where it gets weird. Somehow that video guy photo shopped the image of my partner climbing in the ring and another cane being thrown in the ring. It also shows my partner, Hot Shot Mike Reed, whacking the skull of String Bean with it. Of course the owner reverses the decision as I am not one of those pretty boys.
Even if this was not a doctored video, come on! My team loses on account of a this? Our title shot delayed because of this? How is this not biased? Is this not acceptable behavior in professional sports?
Politics, bah!
I can not wait to make it to the Big Leagues where this type of travesty would never happen. It would be accepted and I made into a hero! I would probably even get a contract extension and bonus out of it too.
Our loss to the Heavyweights is comparable only to Bugs Bunny being robbed of his victory against Cecil Turtle.
Ah Grasshopper you have returned. Sadly, no training for you! I am too upset from this weekend’s events. Comeback tomorrow when I return to my place of tranquility.
Ah Grasshopper you have returned. Sadly, no training for you! I am too upset from this weekend’s events. Comeback tomorrow when I return to my place of tranquility.
Wednesday, April 2, 2008
Heavyweights? Please.....
The Heavyweights, I repeat, The Heavyweights?Give me a break! This “feared” tandem is maybe, I repeat, maybe weighs a combined 250lbs soaking wet.
How is this even a competition?
How can I take this match seriously?
Are we supposed to wrestle these guys with one arm tied behind are backs?
Perhaps on our knees?
While the last match had me thinking of moves to do on such a wide variety of opponents ranging from 180 to 400 pounds, now I am thinking of moves not to do. I see myself pretty much doing whatever I please during this match. The only obstacle will be keeping it interesting to my fans for longer than thirty seconds, which I will certainly find a way.
Let us see how wrestling columnist Justin Ayers see’s this “Tag Team Attraction.”
“Two teams as different as you can get, will be pitted against each other on April 5.The young Heavyweights (Sean Royal & Dan Eckos) are very much looking forward to the opportunity to collide with Leather N Lace (J. J. Crew Guy & Hot Shot Mike Reed).At our last event, The Heavyweights had a devastating loss at the hands of the 848 pound Nigerian Nightmares. It was lucky they made it out of the arena alive. But on April 5, the Heavyweights face another team who are considerably smaller that the Nigerians, but they are still a lot larger than the youngsters and a whole lot stronger and more experienced. The Heavyweights need this win over Leather N Lace to redeem themselves after their recent loss. Hot Shot Mike Reed and J. J. Crew Guy where brought together a few months ago and have been on a roll ever since. They have size, power and most of all experience, which makes them a great tag team combination. They have a sadistic attitude and the brains of manager Sebastian Night guiding them, which makes them DANGEROUS!In looking at this match scheduled for April 5, it could be quite entertaining. Leather N Lace have one thing on their mind….that is…..a PATH TO THE TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIPS…..The Heavyweights want to regain the status they once held in the ECWA and their minds are set on a PATH TO THE TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIPS.One team brings all the attributes that it takes to dominate in this match, but the other much smaller team brings DETERMINATION and HEART.The Heavyweights have fought all the odds before and pulled out many surprise victories in the past and they will be looking to do so on April 5. Standing in their way is the larger and more experienced team of Leather N Lace. Will size, power and experience pull it all together again for the Crew Guy N The Hot Shot, or will the speed and agility of The Heavyweights cause Leather N Lace to try and keep up the pace?”
Determination and Heart? Give me a break. Not a chance. That heart will be broken, stomped on and slung upon the entire front row before the night is out.
Take this one to the bank Leather and Lace fans, we can keep up the pace.
Six rounds of GPP with some rope work and sprints will definitely see to that.
See you all there for the slaughter!
http://ecwaprowrestling.com/main/index.html
Ahh Grasshopper you have returned.
The Crouch Balance Mastered you say?
Good, we shall move you to the weeping meadows for step two towards the “Ultimate Handstand”
Best to find a tree. Place hands about a foot and a half from the trunk. Splay them fingers like I instructed last week. Keep all your fingers slightly bent. Left leg should be straight, right leg bent under (knee under stomach).
Raise your head as far as possible and move shoulders forward so the weight is taken from your legs and transferred over the arms.
Note: Head position is very important.
Push yourself forward with the left legs, raising both legs in the air. Do so with enough speed so they will fall forward against the tree trunk. A pillow should be placed just forward of your head in case you lose balance.
Do several dozen times throughout the day grasshopper, but do not over do. Patience, Grasshopper, patience
Wednesday, March 26, 2008
One Handed Handstand, Old School Style
How cool is the one handed handstand?How much cooler would it be to curl up, dip the chest slowly till it touches the floor then slowly, with control, press up into a two handed handstand? After holding the two handed handstand for a spell, shift your weight to one side and raise the opposing limb upwards so you are poised on a single arm?
Pretty damn cool I would dare say.
Want to know how? Read on Grasshopper.
Want to know what brought this on? Answer: MTV.
While I am not a big fan of MTV, I do have to say I am quite entertained with the show “America’s Best Dance Crew.” If you get a chance you would do well to check it out, especially the JabbaWockeez hip hop timeline. While the “Ultimate Handstand” is not performed as I described above it can be seen often in the form of “Freeze’s.”
This Thursday marks the finals for this season, but it was last weeks “battles” you really want to check out. They are re-running it several times through the day leading up to the finals as this is one of those text your vote deals and they certainly want to elicit as many votes as possible.
Even if you are not a fan of hip-hop or dancing the flexibility, agility, and athleticism exhibited are quite remarkable. I am still in awe at the head spin done in the last battle leading up to the finals. Mind blowing!
Check it out, it gets the JJCrewguy seal of approval.
Who knows next season we may even see Renegade Training’s own Grant lead a crew into competition. Hmmm….. I wonder if Jory or Moody can break dance? What about you Doyle? Coach? Did Grant instruct you in the fine arts?
Ahh Grasshopper you wish to rise to the Mountain’s Summit?
A one handed handstand you say? A Freeze? The Ultimate?
Walk through cut grass before you fly over the meadow young cricket-san. Implement the Crouch Balance daily.
Return only when mastered:
The Crouch Balance:
This training maneuver will help strengthen the wrists and arms. Only when these are properly strengthened can you hope to support and then adjust your bodyweight cricket-san. Only then will you be powerful enough…..
Crouch down, place hands flat on floor (about a foot in front of knees), splay fingers out with index pointing straight ahead. Brace inner thighs against elbows and slowly lean forward putting your full weight on the wrists and hands. Head position should be forward and upward. The maneuver will resemble a tripod, but knees are outside elbows not on top and head is off the ground not on.
Practice till perfect. Return then.
Tuesday, March 18, 2008
Warning: Do not try this at Home!
Ice chills my neck.
Ice chills my knee.
Heat warms my back.
Fresh popped popcorn delights my mouth.
The television says channel 105.
The Dolby Surround Sound is cranked and my subwoofer is rocking the house.
The phone is not going to get answered and the world could be aflame, but I really don’t care. I am exactly where I want to be in the universe on a Monday. In my basement.
Ice chills my knee.
Heat warms my back.
Fresh popped popcorn delights my mouth.
The television says channel 105.
The Dolby Surround Sound is cranked and my subwoofer is rocking the house.
The phone is not going to get answered and the world could be aflame, but I really don’t care. I am exactly where I want to be in the universe on a Monday. In my basement.
Pop Quiz Hot Shot. What is on the tube?
Yep, you guessed it. Wrestling.
Yeah, you might have guessed Wrestling was on, but I can guarantee you can not guess where this blog is heading. Go ahead, try.
Times up Hot Shot, you failed.
Yeah, you might have guessed Wrestling was on, but I can guarantee you can not guess where this blog is heading. Go ahead, try.
Times up Hot Shot, you failed.
One more chance, one more pop quiz.
Which of the following should carry a “WARNING” sticker?
Taco Bell or Skateboarding?
I have seen it a hundred times, perhaps two hundred. I am sure you have seen it too, you know that pesky Taco Bell commercial where everyone has big long strings of cheese coming out of their mouths. They play it continuously on the few shows I choose to watch (yeah, I know we'll talk about my viewing pleasures later). Well despite having seen this commercial a hundred plus times I just noticed something last night I never seen before. In the scene where there is an older guy (looks like a magistrate of some sort) sitting on stairs with a kid holding a skateboard, both eating tacos, a small warning flashes on the bottom of the screen. “Warning: Professional Skateboarders, do not attempt.” I am paraphrasing of coarse as the warning was only their for a blink and the commercial is definitely not tape worthy. At first I could not believe what I saw, but when the commercial was re-run it was their again. Blink, and it was gone. I really had trouble figuring out why the warning was there. In the back ground there were two kids riding skate boards, and one did perform a miniscule ollie in the brief one second blip, but come on. Is that really warning worthy? What kind of Nancy boys have we become? A warning for riding a skateboard on flat ground with full safety gear? Even the kid eating the taco had his safety gear on! Be for real folks!
What I want to know, Hot Shot, is why were their no other warnings?
Warning: Fast Food is bad for your heart.
Warning: Fast Food has not nutritional value, none, zero, zip, zilch.
Warning: Fast Food is bad for the body, mind and soul.
Warning: Probably contains one or more of the following: Estradiol, Progesterone,
Testosterone, Zeranol, Trenbolone acetate, Melengesterol. (ooh the guys at my gym are reading that line again.)
Warning: Contains multiple Antibiotics. (sorry kiddies won't prevent acne, or keep you from getting sick)
Warning: The following has been Irraditated.(Yes radiation, Homer.)
Warning: May cause Cancer.
I could go on, but you get the point. Oooh, let me re-phrase that. If your Renegade you get the point and the point of this blog.
Ah Grasshopper here is your advice for the day in case the above was too cryptic: Skinned flesh and broken bones heal easier than cancer, and tell a much better tale.
Which of the following should carry a “WARNING” sticker?
Taco Bell or Skateboarding?
I have seen it a hundred times, perhaps two hundred. I am sure you have seen it too, you know that pesky Taco Bell commercial where everyone has big long strings of cheese coming out of their mouths. They play it continuously on the few shows I choose to watch (yeah, I know we'll talk about my viewing pleasures later). Well despite having seen this commercial a hundred plus times I just noticed something last night I never seen before. In the scene where there is an older guy (looks like a magistrate of some sort) sitting on stairs with a kid holding a skateboard, both eating tacos, a small warning flashes on the bottom of the screen. “Warning: Professional Skateboarders, do not attempt.” I am paraphrasing of coarse as the warning was only their for a blink and the commercial is definitely not tape worthy. At first I could not believe what I saw, but when the commercial was re-run it was their again. Blink, and it was gone. I really had trouble figuring out why the warning was there. In the back ground there were two kids riding skate boards, and one did perform a miniscule ollie in the brief one second blip, but come on. Is that really warning worthy? What kind of Nancy boys have we become? A warning for riding a skateboard on flat ground with full safety gear? Even the kid eating the taco had his safety gear on! Be for real folks!
What I want to know, Hot Shot, is why were their no other warnings?
Warning: Fast Food is bad for your heart.
Warning: Fast Food has not nutritional value, none, zero, zip, zilch.
Warning: Fast Food is bad for the body, mind and soul.
Warning: Probably contains one or more of the following: Estradiol, Progesterone,
Testosterone, Zeranol, Trenbolone acetate, Melengesterol. (ooh the guys at my gym are reading that line again.)
Warning: Contains multiple Antibiotics. (sorry kiddies won't prevent acne, or keep you from getting sick)
Warning: The following has been Irraditated.(Yes radiation, Homer.)
Warning: May cause Cancer.
I could go on, but you get the point. Oooh, let me re-phrase that. If your Renegade you get the point and the point of this blog.
Ah Grasshopper here is your advice for the day in case the above was too cryptic: Skinned flesh and broken bones heal easier than cancer, and tell a much better tale.
Eat good wholesome food. Eat grass fed beef, limit those grains, and eliminate that soda.
If you heed my advice you just may be able to stick that ollie a little higher than the rest and possibly keep up with me.
Wednesday, March 12, 2008
The Black Knight
How do you handle injury?
Do you "overcome adversity?"
Do you cower and quit under duress?
Do you continually find lame excuses?
My Question for you is:
Are you Black Knight worthy?
Read on and then ask yourself again.
Through the narrow slit of the Green Knight’s helm a sword is driven sending blood spaying. Upon the hilt the Black Knight grasps and pulls his sword free. Blood starts to form a lake at his feet.
“You fight with the strength of many men, sir knight.” Another knight asks.
The Black Knight says nothing.
“I am Arthur, king of the Britons.”
Silence blankets the land.
“I seek the finest and the bravest knights in the land to join me at my
court at Camelot.”
Silence again.
“You have proved yourself worthy. Will you join me?”
Silence yet again.
“You make me sad. So be it! Come, Patsy!”
“None shall pass!” The Black Knight finally bellows.
“What?”
“None shall pass!” The Black Knight repeats.
“I have no quarrel with you, good sir knight, but I must cross
this bridge.”
“Then you shall die!” says the Black Knight.
“I command you, as king of the Britons, to stand aside.”
“I move for no man!” The Black Knight taunts.
“So be it!”
The two battle in a heated duel with Arthur eventually landing a shot that severs the Black Knight’s arm off. Blood spays quite profusely. (Unfortunately the Black Knight had not been training Renegade. His movements are quite slow. Was Hammer Strength or Nautliss in the gyms back then?)
“Now stand aside, worthy adversary.” Arthur the apparent victor speaks looking at the severed arm.
“Tis but a scratch.” The Black Knight responds.
“A Scratch. Your arm's off!”
“No it isn't!” The Black Knight counters
“Well what's that then?” Arthur points to the arm on the ground.
“I've had worse.” The Black Knight responds.
“You Liar!” Arthur yells.
“Come on, you pansy!” The Black Knight taunts.
Another battle ensues and the Black Knight loses his other arm. Really should have logged on to Renegade Training.com
Arthur kneels to the ground,
“Victory is mine! We thank thee Lord, that in thy mercy—“
The Black Knight kicks Arthur on his side.
“Come on, then!” He yells kicking Arthur again.
“What?!?”
“Have at you!” the Black Knight continues kicking.
“You are indeed brave, sir knight, but the fight
is mine!”
“Ohhh, had enough, eh?” The Black Knight continues.
“Look, you stupid bastard, you've got no arms left!”
“Yes I have!”
“Look!”
“Just a flesh wound!” The Black Knight responds kicking at Arthur again.
“Look, stop that!“Chicken! Chicken!” The Black Knight taunts.
“Look, I'll have your leg!”
The Black Knight does not quit.
“Right!” Arthur yells chopping off the Black Knight’s leg.
“Right! I'll do you for that!” The Black Knight yells hopping on one leg.
“You'll What?”
“Come 'ere!” the Black Knight tells Arthur.
“What're you going to do, bleed on me?”
“I’m invincible!” The Black Knight yells.
“You're a looney....”
“The Black Knight Always Triumphs! Have at you!” The Black Knight yells hopping around as he attempts to kick Arthur.
With a shrug and swing of his long sword Arthur severs the Black Knights remaining limb. On the ground the Black Knight realizes he can’t move.
“Okay, we'll call it a draw.” He says in fairness.
“Come, Pasty!” Arthur rides off.
“Oh! Had enough, eh? Come back and take what's coming to you, you yellow bastards!! Come back here and take what's coming to you! I'll bite your legs off!”
If you have not seen Monty Python and the Holy Grail you owe to yourself to see this “Classic” if only for this one scene.
http://www.intriguing.com/mp/holygrail.asp
Through the narrow slit of the Green Knight’s helm a sword is driven sending blood spaying. Upon the hilt the Black Knight grasps and pulls his sword free. Blood starts to form a lake at his feet.
“You fight with the strength of many men, sir knight.” Another knight asks.
The Black Knight says nothing.
“I am Arthur, king of the Britons.”
Silence blankets the land.
“I seek the finest and the bravest knights in the land to join me at my
court at Camelot.”
Silence again.
“You have proved yourself worthy. Will you join me?”
Silence yet again.
“You make me sad. So be it! Come, Patsy!”
“None shall pass!” The Black Knight finally bellows.
“What?”
“None shall pass!” The Black Knight repeats.
“I have no quarrel with you, good sir knight, but I must cross
this bridge.”
“Then you shall die!” says the Black Knight.
“I command you, as king of the Britons, to stand aside.”
“I move for no man!” The Black Knight taunts.
“So be it!”
The two battle in a heated duel with Arthur eventually landing a shot that severs the Black Knight’s arm off. Blood spays quite profusely. (Unfortunately the Black Knight had not been training Renegade. His movements are quite slow. Was Hammer Strength or Nautliss in the gyms back then?)
“Now stand aside, worthy adversary.” Arthur the apparent victor speaks looking at the severed arm.
“Tis but a scratch.” The Black Knight responds.
“A Scratch. Your arm's off!”
“No it isn't!” The Black Knight counters
“Well what's that then?” Arthur points to the arm on the ground.
“I've had worse.” The Black Knight responds.
“You Liar!” Arthur yells.
“Come on, you pansy!” The Black Knight taunts.
Another battle ensues and the Black Knight loses his other arm. Really should have logged on to Renegade Training.com
Arthur kneels to the ground,
“Victory is mine! We thank thee Lord, that in thy mercy—“
The Black Knight kicks Arthur on his side.
“Come on, then!” He yells kicking Arthur again.
“What?!?”
“Have at you!” the Black Knight continues kicking.
“You are indeed brave, sir knight, but the fight
is mine!”
“Ohhh, had enough, eh?” The Black Knight continues.
“Look, you stupid bastard, you've got no arms left!”
“Yes I have!”
“Look!”
“Just a flesh wound!” The Black Knight responds kicking at Arthur again.
“Look, stop that!“Chicken! Chicken!” The Black Knight taunts.
“Look, I'll have your leg!”
The Black Knight does not quit.
“Right!” Arthur yells chopping off the Black Knight’s leg.
“Right! I'll do you for that!” The Black Knight yells hopping on one leg.
“You'll What?”
“Come 'ere!” the Black Knight tells Arthur.
“What're you going to do, bleed on me?”
“I’m invincible!” The Black Knight yells.
“You're a looney....”
“The Black Knight Always Triumphs! Have at you!” The Black Knight yells hopping around as he attempts to kick Arthur.
With a shrug and swing of his long sword Arthur severs the Black Knights remaining limb. On the ground the Black Knight realizes he can’t move.
“Okay, we'll call it a draw.” He says in fairness.
“Come, Pasty!” Arthur rides off.
“Oh! Had enough, eh? Come back and take what's coming to you, you yellow bastards!! Come back here and take what's coming to you! I'll bite your legs off!”
If you have not seen Monty Python and the Holy Grail you owe to yourself to see this “Classic” if only for this one scene.
http://www.intriguing.com/mp/holygrail.asp
Here is where I copied the script from before adding my flair.
http://www.intriguing.com/mp/_scripts/knight.asp
Remember the Black Knight when you flee to the couch because your toe hurts or the doctor just prescribed you some drug you don’t really need to handle some minor discomfort.
Remember the Black Knight when you bail out of one of my training sessions to go smoke pot and get suspended from school.
Remember the Black Knight when you cry to me you want to be the best on the Soccer field this season and bail after two rounds of GPP because you were out partying the night before.
Remember the Black Knight when you stick that needle in your butt in an effort to fix an imbalance that could be fixed through sweat and dedication.
Remember I am Renegade, I am not in it for the money. I am not in it to waste my time.
I am in it to “improve the quality of your life.”
http://www.intriguing.com/mp/_scripts/knight.asp
Remember the Black Knight when you flee to the couch because your toe hurts or the doctor just prescribed you some drug you don’t really need to handle some minor discomfort.
Remember the Black Knight when you bail out of one of my training sessions to go smoke pot and get suspended from school.
Remember the Black Knight when you cry to me you want to be the best on the Soccer field this season and bail after two rounds of GPP because you were out partying the night before.
Remember the Black Knight when you stick that needle in your butt in an effort to fix an imbalance that could be fixed through sweat and dedication.
Remember I am Renegade, I am not in it for the money. I am not in it to waste my time.
I am in it to “improve the quality of your life.”
Thursday, March 6, 2008
Riddle me this... Why do I wrestle? pt.2
“Wham!”“Oomph!”
“Pow!”
“Kaboom!”
Darkness momentarily settles atop the brilliant flashes light.
No, Adam West is not about to appear and save the day. Neither is his sidekick Burt Ward. This is not the 60’s but rather Saturday March 1, 2008 and I am laying on my back seeing stars. While I do have a nifty Goth like belt holding up my leather pants it is certainly no “Utility Belt” and most definitely does not hold any “Anti-Mega Spray” or “Anti Shark Repellant.” This unfortunately is what happens when an angry 6’8” 400lb man nails you with a size 15 boot. You see stars and think your in some wacky episode of the original Batman. You also think “this was not in the plan.”
Checking my jaw to make sure it is not broken I craw to the ropes, it is the only way I am going to get back to my feet and make a tag. I pull myself up and “Wham!”
A fist greets my chin. Off I go into the ropes opposite. The ropes stretch and then I am shot like a marble leaving a wrist rocket into the waiting boot of Mega, yet again. This time I go down hard and think “Eccentric, Concentric” for some odd reason. Don’t know what I am talking about? Your not Renegade then.
It is just a matter of breaths before all 400lbs comes crashing upon my chest. I like my ribs, I really do. By some miracle, my manager Sebastian Night is up on the ring apron. Now he looks like he just came out of an episode of Batman, some sort of genetic mutation of the Joker, Penguin and the Riddler all in one. And yes the Riddler was the coolest!
Mega sees him and promptly forgets about breaking some ribs. I sure as hell am not going anywhere. As Mega grabs Sebastian and delivers a drawn out thunderous punch a cane magically slides before me. I grab the cane and struggle to my feet with its aid. The behemoth turns….
“Wham!” Into his gut I drive the cane with all I got. By my side Burt Ward appears and motions for the neck. Around the neck I wrap my arm. “Go,” he shouts and into the canvas we both drive Mega’s head.
“Who sucks now?” I yell to the crowd before hi-fiving my partner. The crowd most definately thinks I still do. I turn for the cover, and…..”Splat!” The Beast clotheslines both me and my sidekick at a dead run. He is pissed!
We just spent a good 5 minutes beating him down with an arsenal of offensive maneuvers and he is making up for all of it in one move. Over the top rope and onto the hard gym floor I crash nearly atop my fallen manager. A breath later, the Beast is falling atop me having been dumped by the team of Trouble, and Robere.
One, two, three! Our Victory, our number one contender slot, our chance at gold, stolen in a heartbeat by a pair of 150 lb wimps! A victory so cheesy, so unbelievable, it could only be an episode of the original Batman! No, not the movie kiddies! The TV show!
This is why I wrestle.
Ah Grasshopper riddle me this from 1966:
“What is always coming, but never arrives?
Quickly, Quickly!”
“........Tomorrow. For when it arrives it is today, and today my dear rodents, should prove to be most memorable!” The Riddler, Frank Goshin, 1966?
Ah much too easy Grasshopper. Try another.
“There were three men in a boat with four cigarettes and no matches. How did they manage to smoke?” Asks the Riddler.
“They threw the cigarette overboard and made the boat a CIGARETTE LIGHTER!” Come on Grasshopper, if Robin got it in 1966 you should have too!
Is this the end of the riddles? Will our hero ever get the titles? Did you have to cheat? Do you know what eccentric and concentric mean now?
Answers tomorrow…same Bat time….same Bat channel.
Monday, March 3, 2008
Why I Wrestle pt.1
The announcer, Josh “Buffer”, is talking, but I am not listening. I am just staring into a curtain of darkness holding RX pos #1 in an effort to keep the hips loose, they are.
“Okay, now.” Sebastion says. I had not even realized our music had been cued but I am through the curtain and yelling “I got the skill, who can match me? No-one! You ain’t got skill you noodle armed choirboy!” I yell at the group of kids that had run up to guardrail. I recognize them from last month and lay into them with a few other lines before spotting my some new prey for this month.
There on the opposite side of the ring, near were the “pretty boys” come out, I see exactly what I am looking for, all wearing their shirts from a recent “Special Olympic” competition. With purpose I stride across the gym floor my eyes fixed.
“You say something punk? What? Oh you think you got skill? Let’s see what you chumps got. I will take you, you and you, yeah you in the wheelchair trying to slither away, on! Right now! Come on Nancy Boy, unlock that brake and wheel it on around. In the ring now! C’mon punks, those Olympic medals don’t mean squat here!” Three more kids rush up in defense, all wearing yellow shirts too. I move right up to the guardrail and stick my forehead against their leader who is turning red as he yells furiously and gives me a push.
This is why I wrestle.
Normally any physical contact on either side of the guardrail is forbidden, but I made an exception in this case. “Did you see that! Hot Shot get over here!” I scream. My partner Hot Shot Mike Reed is sharing the same look as some of the parents in the other sections of the gym have plastered upon their faces. Rookies, I think to myself.
Reluctantly my partner comes over and I get him involved in the tirade. This is where my former partner, a master in this area of wrestling J.R.Ryder excelled. Hot Shot still has not got it yet.
In the background I can see the kid’s dad laughing his ass off as he takes picture after picture. Perfect, just as I planned. The crowd is really getting upset at this point.
This is why I wrestle.
Security comes over because it looks to be a breath away from becoming out of control.
“JJ sucks! Over rated!” I can hear the chants starting. A few posters saying such appear. Even better. I snatch them out of hands yelling whatever comes to mind.
“Aimed at you were the cowboys from hell.
“Okay, now.” Sebastion says. I had not even realized our music had been cued but I am through the curtain and yelling “I got the skill, who can match me? No-one! You ain’t got skill you noodle armed choirboy!” I yell at the group of kids that had run up to guardrail. I recognize them from last month and lay into them with a few other lines before spotting my some new prey for this month.
There on the opposite side of the ring, near were the “pretty boys” come out, I see exactly what I am looking for, all wearing their shirts from a recent “Special Olympic” competition. With purpose I stride across the gym floor my eyes fixed.
“You say something punk? What? Oh you think you got skill? Let’s see what you chumps got. I will take you, you and you, yeah you in the wheelchair trying to slither away, on! Right now! Come on Nancy Boy, unlock that brake and wheel it on around. In the ring now! C’mon punks, those Olympic medals don’t mean squat here!” Three more kids rush up in defense, all wearing yellow shirts too. I move right up to the guardrail and stick my forehead against their leader who is turning red as he yells furiously and gives me a push.
This is why I wrestle.
Normally any physical contact on either side of the guardrail is forbidden, but I made an exception in this case. “Did you see that! Hot Shot get over here!” I scream. My partner Hot Shot Mike Reed is sharing the same look as some of the parents in the other sections of the gym have plastered upon their faces. Rookies, I think to myself.
Reluctantly my partner comes over and I get him involved in the tirade. This is where my former partner, a master in this area of wrestling J.R.Ryder excelled. Hot Shot still has not got it yet.
In the background I can see the kid’s dad laughing his ass off as he takes picture after picture. Perfect, just as I planned. The crowd is really getting upset at this point.
This is why I wrestle.
Security comes over because it looks to be a breath away from becoming out of control.
“JJ sucks! Over rated!” I can hear the chants starting. A few posters saying such appear. Even better. I snatch them out of hands yelling whatever comes to mind.
“Aimed at you were the cowboys from hell.
Deed is done again, weve won
Aint talking no tall tales friend
cause high noon, your doom
Comin for you were the cowboys from hell”
Pantera is blasting over the speakers and I realize it is well into the song and I need to get in the ring. As I make a quick stroll along the outside of the ring an older guy races out of the bleachers getting right in my face, one leg through the guardrail. Despite having spent too much time already yelling at fans I still feel obligated. I see three more older guys a few seats down. They are sitting with arms crossed, looking bored. Though unrelated to the first I start unleashing my fury upon them. No one will ever be bored in one of my matches! One even has a sleeveless shirt on, heh, heh, heh, why not send me an invitation next time. I make some reference to zits and his biceps before realizing the song is over and I really need to get in the ring. Believe it or not I actually have some wrestling to do.
This my friends is why I wrestle.
Tune-age of the day: Cowboys from Hell, Pantera
Ah Grasshopper, More training I see is in order. Ponder the following:
“You will find as you look back upon your life that the moments that stand out, the moments when you have really lived, are the moments when you have done things in the spirit of love.” – Henry Drummond
Pantera is blasting over the speakers and I realize it is well into the song and I need to get in the ring. As I make a quick stroll along the outside of the ring an older guy races out of the bleachers getting right in my face, one leg through the guardrail. Despite having spent too much time already yelling at fans I still feel obligated. I see three more older guys a few seats down. They are sitting with arms crossed, looking bored. Though unrelated to the first I start unleashing my fury upon them. No one will ever be bored in one of my matches! One even has a sleeveless shirt on, heh, heh, heh, why not send me an invitation next time. I make some reference to zits and his biceps before realizing the song is over and I really need to get in the ring. Believe it or not I actually have some wrestling to do.
This my friends is why I wrestle.
Tune-age of the day: Cowboys from Hell, Pantera
Ah Grasshopper, More training I see is in order. Ponder the following:
“You will find as you look back upon your life that the moments that stand out, the moments when you have really lived, are the moments when you have done things in the spirit of love.” – Henry Drummond
Thursday, February 28, 2008
McKenna's GPP
Thursday Training Plan:
12:00pm Lunch time. Hurdle work, static holds, pink.
7:45pm Feeling good today. I do not know what it is about LPS but it just seems to put everything in alignment. On paper you shrug and say big deal, I have done or do most of that stuff. Yeah, you probably have, but until you apply it in the order and time it was designed keep your mouth shut. Try it I dare you, double dare you. It only takes 30 minutes twice a week. Let’s see Brian Alvarez or Michael Polinko try this and then go back to a Boflex.
12:00pm Lunch time. Hurdle work, static holds, pink.
7:45pm Feeling good today. I do not know what it is about LPS but it just seems to put everything in alignment. On paper you shrug and say big deal, I have done or do most of that stuff. Yeah, you probably have, but until you apply it in the order and time it was designed keep your mouth shut. Try it I dare you, double dare you. It only takes 30 minutes twice a week. Let’s see Brian Alvarez or Michael Polinko try this and then go back to a Boflex.
The plan tonight is Recovery and Range of Motion work. It will be a repeat of Tuesday’s workout. As you might notice I have elected to keep GPP in my workout plans. If you have been reading Tom Mastrocola's blog http://tommasomastrocola.blogspot.com/2008/02/bear-hunting.html then you noticed he just eliminated GPP from his training and replaced it with SPP as the season approaches. Unfortunately Pro-Wrestling is not seasonal thus I need an alternate strategy. Had this been Football, baseball, soccer etc… I would have followed Tom’s lead. GPP is still an area I need to work out, as far as doing it 2 days before a match I am not really concerned as my diet is right on and I am getting plenty of sleep.
Something’s in life standout. One such instance for me was Coach McKenna discussing GPP. I could not tell you whether he wrote it on a forum or mentioned it at Cert class, but I remember him saying “I have my lineman recite blocking assignments during GPP.” This really made an impression on me. Tonight my plan going into GPP was to envision each opponent and what moves would be best suited to each of my four competitors.
This would go something like:
If I got the Beast cornered what is my best offense? He is big, heavy, then punch, punch, punch, shoot into opposite corner might work.
If he hits it chest on then what? Clothesline?, Russian Leg Sweep, can I get him in a submission? Octopus perhaps or is he too big? Cover? Start working the arm? What if he turns and hits the buckles facing me? Drop kick to the knees? Elbow?
What if he reverses somehow?
My hope was to come up with a loose set of sequences for each competitor. Unfortunately this, like LPS, sounds and looks easy on paper. Doing it while performing GPP is extremely, extremely, extremely hard. Sure the first round or two might not be bad, but after that……
I have yet to master this feat. It went well for a couple of rounds but I had to abandon my efforts to keep a kid working in with me motivated and thinking of other things rather than how little oxygen their was going into his lungs. Hey that was the deal, I would teach him ladder work, but he had to join me for GPP and not quit. He did fine, but I had to bite my tongue as I tried to get him working out with me months ago well before the start of track season which starts Monday. Too little to late. Learn a lesson there kiddies.
Tune-Age of the Day: “Schism” by one of my all time favorites Tool. I know the pieces fit. I just need to fit them.
Ahh Grasshopper you have returned, good. Remember your Affirmations: Be positive. Avoid negatives. “Do not say I will not give up during GPP tonight.” Your brain will interpret it as “I will give up during GPP tonight.” Instead say “Tonight I will only do 5 rounds of GPP.” Now go give me 5 rounds and don’t forget your blocking assignments or I will have Coach McKenna pay you a visit!
Wednesday, February 27, 2008
The Beast
The stage is set the backdrop lowered but who’s in the cast?
Team #1
Team #1
The Beast Glen Osbourne & 400 lb, Mega:
“Osbourne and Mega are an interesting combination…..Osbourne is more of a brawler, but this wily iconic veteran can wrestle technically with the best of them. Titles are nothing new to the Beast. Mega is looking for his 1st taste of title gold in the ECWA. He has been in the ECWA for many years and has never worn a championship. This team brings the size, experience & power on March 1.”
Glen is…well a beast see pic, and Mega is…. “Mega” 400lbs. This is a case where the monikers fit. I have had experience wrestling against both these opponents and let me say pinning either one of these guys is going to be no easy task. The shear size of “Mega” really limits your offences, and Glen has seen about everything one can see thrown at them in a ring. Glen and I have a long standing feud from way back so I am definitely planning on focusing my efforts on him just to be a smart-ass and dig up some bad blood. Just how am I going to go about it is a question. Despite owning a pinfall victory over Mega, I intend on avoiding this behemoth if possible, which means I probably will be confronting him most of the match… Murphy’s Law.
Team#2
Glen is…well a beast see pic, and Mega is…. “Mega” 400lbs. This is a case where the monikers fit. I have had experience wrestling against both these opponents and let me say pinning either one of these guys is going to be no easy task. The shear size of “Mega” really limits your offences, and Glen has seen about everything one can see thrown at them in a ring. Glen and I have a long standing feud from way back so I am definitely planning on focusing my efforts on him just to be a smart-ass and dig up some bad blood. Just how am I going to go about it is a question. Despite owning a pinfall victory over Mega, I intend on avoiding this behemoth if possible, which means I probably will be confronting him most of the match… Murphy’s Law.
Team#2
Robere’ Shields & Tommy Trouble:
“Trouble has just enlisted manger/fitness coach Jim Shorts to be his personal trainer…What’s that all about…..we have been told Shorts will lead these two down the aisle on March 1. Trouble is a tough competitor in the ring who can do it all and he teams with the much under rated French Star, Robere’ Shields. These two bring a lot of energy, youth and quickness to the ring. Will it pay off against two larger and more experienced teams?”
I really don’t know too much about either of these wrestlers other than they might weigh a buck sixty each soaking wet. I hear they are extremely talented and fly around the ring a lot but other than that I got nothing. From what I gather they are a modern day Rock and Roll Express. More Nancy Boys if you ask me!
I really don’t know too much about either of these wrestlers other than they might weigh a buck sixty each soaking wet. I hear they are extremely talented and fly around the ring a lot but other than that I got nothing. From what I gather they are a modern day Rock and Roll Express. More Nancy Boys if you ask me!
Team#3
J. J. Crew Guy & Hot Shot Mike Reed: “The Crew Guy and Mike Reed joined forces last show to make an impressive combination billed as “Leather & Lace”. Reed dumped his long time tag team partner Frederick of Hollywood to team up with the Crew Guy. There is still a lot of bad blood between Reed and Frederick. J. J. the Crew Guy is no stranger to ECWA gold and marquee matches. He once headlined the biggest show in ECWA history. This team brings power, strength, experience and the diabolical mind of manager Sebastian Night with them to the ring on March 1.”
I know my talents and limitations. I know “Hot Shot” is top shelf material when it comes to talent. He trained at the Monster Factory and reminds me of his mentor Larry Sharpe and Ric Flair combined. But, to be honest I am not really comfortable yet with Mike as we are complete opposites when it comes to personalities. We just have not gelled, and whether we do or not is left to be seen. The promoter who asked us to team up is really high on the idea together, and who am I to argue? He has been promoting wrestling since 1967 and has not been wrong about a pairing yet. When he paired me with the infamous J.R.Ryder (you will be hearing alot about this ace here in the future) to form the “J-Team” I was reluctant at first also. It took a few matches for us to come together, but when we finally got on the same page there was not a better tag-team on the independent circuit. You heard me, NOT A BETTER TEAM ON THE INDEPENDENT CIRCUIT! As they would say in the Blues Brothers “We had a band powerful enough to turn goat piss into gasoline”
I know my talents and limitations. I know “Hot Shot” is top shelf material when it comes to talent. He trained at the Monster Factory and reminds me of his mentor Larry Sharpe and Ric Flair combined. But, to be honest I am not really comfortable yet with Mike as we are complete opposites when it comes to personalities. We just have not gelled, and whether we do or not is left to be seen. The promoter who asked us to team up is really high on the idea together, and who am I to argue? He has been promoting wrestling since 1967 and has not been wrong about a pairing yet. When he paired me with the infamous J.R.Ryder (you will be hearing alot about this ace here in the future) to form the “J-Team” I was reluctant at first also. It took a few matches for us to come together, but when we finally got on the same page there was not a better tag-team on the independent circuit. You heard me, NOT A BETTER TEAM ON THE INDEPENDENT CIRCUIT! As they would say in the Blues Brothers “We had a band powerful enough to turn goat piss into gasoline”
Where are you buddy? You better not be at a 2 live Crew concert. I need you!
Wednesday Training Plan:
12:00pm Lunch time. Hurdle work, static holds, pink. I told you I do this every lunch hour. You did not believe me did you? Believe, I said Believe!
Wednesday Training Plan:
12:00pm Lunch time. Hurdle work, static holds, pink. I told you I do this every lunch hour. You did not believe me did you? Believe, I said Believe!
7:45pm I was real tight going into this workout. Hams, hip flexors lower back. It appears I made my first miscalculation for the week having included rotation work yesterday. This is a weak point for me that I am addressing, but I should have known better to include it especially after doing a full med ball workout Sunday. Not a big mistake, but something to note. Other previous lessons include not including anything new in the mix on match week.
I was not sure how I was going to handle the issue going into my workout. My thinking was just to see how I felt after GPP. If I felt good then I would proceed with resistance work, if not I still got a hell of a workout in and would move right to pink
LPS was my biggest concern, especially having done a session on Monday. If I did not do it tonight then it would have to wait till next week. Thursday-Saturday would not allow enough recovery time I feared. Had I not been wrestling this week I would not have hesitated in making this a recovery day and repeating Tuesday’s workout.
However just cause I was pissed off at myself and the workout was going really well I proceeded with my initial plan. Let me say Good Workout!
Hurdle work, tumbling drills. A little bit of shuttle sprint work with a few dive rolls thrown in the mix. Rope work, 5 rounds of GPP (4 good rounds, what ehhh!) followed by one arm barbell snatches, push jerks, squats, a couple of pullups, LPS, Pink, and again….tanning. Normally I would throw some good morning squats, snatch-grip deadlifts in the mix, but my goals are to be loose, and save the knees for Saturday so I elected to leave them out.
Tune-Age of the Day: “Holy Diver” Kill Switch Engage. Really digging the remix.
Ahh Grasshopper remember, "The gyms you go to are crowded with guys trying to look like men, as if being a man means looking the way a sculptor or an art director says." ~Chuck Palahniuk
Thursday we begin figuring out a game plan to handle my opponents.
Tuesday, February 26, 2008
#1 Contender?
The date: Saturday March 1, 2008
The time: 7:00pm
The place: Boys and Girls club Rt.40 Bear Delaware
The Match: #1 Contenders 3-way tag match with the winners facing off in a 3-way tag match for the Championship in the same night.
Explanation: Well it looks like Murphy’s Law taking over. Here just a week after completing the Bruised Brain Blog, a tale of the complications of wrestling with a concussion and wrestling multiple matches in the same night, I find myself in a similar situation. Lets see if we can do it without a concussion this time.
Here are the details of the match according to Josh Martin, wrestling columnist: “March 1 is a history making night….and this bid for the Tag Team Championships brings no less than 14 of ECWA’s top competitors together in two 3 way No. 1 contenders tag team events that culminate in the 2 winning teams taking on the Logans in the title match. Matt & Bryan Logan are among the most talented and popular teams ever to hold the Tag Championships, but you can rest assured that this talented combination is sizing up all the possibilities of whom they could be facing for the titles. They will have not one team, but two teams to worry about…..and preparing is a nightmare for them….as the contenders will not be known until that same night. So, everyone, including Bryan and Matt will be watching the two 3 way No 1 contenders tag matches very closely.”
Told you it was a Marquee Matchup. Now you see how potentially important this match is? This also means the magazines and scouts will be watching these matches closely as Matt and Bryan Logan have a very good shot of heading to the big time as do the Valedictorians. But, make no doubt about it I am here to leave my mark. I have every intention of taking that gold which should have been mine years ago despite it only being my third match back. Look at those pretty boys, oh man they got some hurtin coming. Logan Brothers Hah, more like the Nancy Boys!
Tuesday Training Plan: Objective, Range of motion work, recovery, work threshold improvement.
12:00pm Lunch time. Hurdle work, static holds, pink. As I said before I do this every lunch hour while the rest of the populace are heading to the China King on Tuesday.
7:45pm Recovery day with emphasis on range of motion. Tons of hurdle work, as well as a double block of tumbling drills. A little bit of shuttle sprint work with a few dive rolls thrown in the mix, sort of a hybred spp drill. Rope work, ladder drills, and of coarse 5 rounds of GPP followed by some rotational med ball work and Fix for shoulder stability. We cap it all off with some static holds, Pink, and I hate to put this into print........tanning. Yeah I said tanning go ahead and bash me on the boards. But, if you saw my last match on tape you would agree. Oh please, like you never tanned! I feel dorky enough standing up in a booth getting tan.
Tune-Age of the Day: “Play the funky music white boy!” Wild Cherry. Get it?
Ah Grasshopper remember always: “Coordinate your forces so that there is a minimum conflict and maximum effect. One uses four ounces to deflect four thousand pounds.” I Ching #61
Tomorrow I will introduce you to my opponents….as if it matters.
The time: 7:00pm
The place: Boys and Girls club Rt.40 Bear Delaware
The Match: #1 Contenders 3-way tag match with the winners facing off in a 3-way tag match for the Championship in the same night.
Explanation: Well it looks like Murphy’s Law taking over. Here just a week after completing the Bruised Brain Blog, a tale of the complications of wrestling with a concussion and wrestling multiple matches in the same night, I find myself in a similar situation. Lets see if we can do it without a concussion this time.
Here are the details of the match according to Josh Martin, wrestling columnist: “March 1 is a history making night….and this bid for the Tag Team Championships brings no less than 14 of ECWA’s top competitors together in two 3 way No. 1 contenders tag team events that culminate in the 2 winning teams taking on the Logans in the title match. Matt & Bryan Logan are among the most talented and popular teams ever to hold the Tag Championships, but you can rest assured that this talented combination is sizing up all the possibilities of whom they could be facing for the titles. They will have not one team, but two teams to worry about…..and preparing is a nightmare for them….as the contenders will not be known until that same night. So, everyone, including Bryan and Matt will be watching the two 3 way No 1 contenders tag matches very closely.”
Told you it was a Marquee Matchup. Now you see how potentially important this match is? This also means the magazines and scouts will be watching these matches closely as Matt and Bryan Logan have a very good shot of heading to the big time as do the Valedictorians. But, make no doubt about it I am here to leave my mark. I have every intention of taking that gold which should have been mine years ago despite it only being my third match back. Look at those pretty boys, oh man they got some hurtin coming. Logan Brothers Hah, more like the Nancy Boys!
Tuesday Training Plan: Objective, Range of motion work, recovery, work threshold improvement.
12:00pm Lunch time. Hurdle work, static holds, pink. As I said before I do this every lunch hour while the rest of the populace are heading to the China King on Tuesday.
7:45pm Recovery day with emphasis on range of motion. Tons of hurdle work, as well as a double block of tumbling drills. A little bit of shuttle sprint work with a few dive rolls thrown in the mix, sort of a hybred spp drill. Rope work, ladder drills, and of coarse 5 rounds of GPP followed by some rotational med ball work and Fix for shoulder stability. We cap it all off with some static holds, Pink, and I hate to put this into print........tanning. Yeah I said tanning go ahead and bash me on the boards. But, if you saw my last match on tape you would agree. Oh please, like you never tanned! I feel dorky enough standing up in a booth getting tan.
Tune-Age of the Day: “Play the funky music white boy!” Wild Cherry. Get it?
Ah Grasshopper remember always: “Coordinate your forces so that there is a minimum conflict and maximum effect. One uses four ounces to deflect four thousand pounds.” I Ching #61
Tomorrow I will introduce you to my opponents….as if it matters.
Monday, February 25, 2008
Barometer of Progression
Once more it has come time to take a reading upon the Barometer of Progression.
This Saturday marks my third big match since making my return to wrestling and possibly the biggest to date. This potential marquee matchup will be a true test of my training to date and possibly be a barometer of what is to come as it has the potential to be a make or break situation for me. If I excel and perform to perfection then it will be “Main Event” time once again for JJCREWGUY. If not I stand the possibility of falling back with the pack till another opportunity arises, and you only get so many chances.
This Saturday marks my third big match since making my return to wrestling and possibly the biggest to date. This potential marquee matchup will be a true test of my training to date and possibly be a barometer of what is to come as it has the potential to be a make or break situation for me. If I excel and perform to perfection then it will be “Main Event” time once again for JJCREWGUY. If not I stand the possibility of falling back with the pack till another opportunity arises, and you only get so many chances.
I hate mediocrity!
I am little surprised this tremendous opportunity has presented itself so early in my return as I have not really had a chance to concentrate on my sports specific skills. This is of great concern to me as it limits my arsenal of moves and causes the match to move extremely fast. What do I mean as fast? By now you have heard the term “Stillness in Motion.” Imagine the Matrix, your "Mr.Anderson", and just learned to see that bullet or punch coming at you in slow motion. Now imagine a real bullet or punch coming after you in real life. Fast or slow? Fast right? Well right now the matches are “fast” for me. It takes a little bit for the commands from my brain to reach the limbs and react accordingly. This has nothing to do with age or brain damage it is just lack of practice. What I need is to get the match to slow down and this will only be accomplished through Sports Specific Training, and experience, at this point. Luckily for the short term I can compensate this lack of Sports Specific Training through my Renegade training skills which remarkably carry over well, and a little thing called Charisma.
I am little surprised this tremendous opportunity has presented itself so early in my return as I have not really had a chance to concentrate on my sports specific skills. This is of great concern to me as it limits my arsenal of moves and causes the match to move extremely fast. What do I mean as fast? By now you have heard the term “Stillness in Motion.” Imagine the Matrix, your "Mr.Anderson", and just learned to see that bullet or punch coming at you in slow motion. Now imagine a real bullet or punch coming after you in real life. Fast or slow? Fast right? Well right now the matches are “fast” for me. It takes a little bit for the commands from my brain to reach the limbs and react accordingly. This has nothing to do with age or brain damage it is just lack of practice. What I need is to get the match to slow down and this will only be accomplished through Sports Specific Training, and experience, at this point. Luckily for the short term I can compensate this lack of Sports Specific Training through my Renegade training skills which remarkably carry over well, and a little thing called Charisma.
This week in the JJCREWGUY blog we will follow my training as I lead up to the “Marquee Match.” I will tell you how I plan to come up with a game plan for success and how I train the week before a big match, which honestly is still in experimentation.
So here we go:
Mondays routine: I hate going to gyms on Mondays, just too many people and not enough mirror space for me to stare at the guns while doing 16 sets of biceps and 16 sets of triceps. Not to mention there will not be a bench, incline bench or chest machine in sight without a dozen people waiting. So if I don't have any clients or classes I either do a home based workout, head to the park, or do it at work when everyone clears out. This week we'll take care of business at work, so this is how the week starts:
12:00pm Lunch time. Hurdle work, static holds, pink. I do this every lunch hour at my first job while the rest of the jokers are heading to Burger King or surfing the net.
7:00pm Hurdle work, Red2 basics, Kettlebell swing, Kettlebell Snatch, Kettlebell cleans, step ups, bodyweight box squats, broomstick overhead squats, one legged kettlebell deadlifts, LPS, Pink and few other odds and ends (hey can't give away all the secrets, I need to eat too. You want to know those little odds or ends, perhaps learn some kettlebell training? Hire me, or buy the kettlebell dvd off the Renegadetraining website http://www.renegadetraining.com/kettlebell_dvd.html.) Like how I worked that plug in? Like I said I got to eat too buddy.
Mondays routine: I hate going to gyms on Mondays, just too many people and not enough mirror space for me to stare at the guns while doing 16 sets of biceps and 16 sets of triceps. Not to mention there will not be a bench, incline bench or chest machine in sight without a dozen people waiting. So if I don't have any clients or classes I either do a home based workout, head to the park, or do it at work when everyone clears out. This week we'll take care of business at work, so this is how the week starts:
12:00pm Lunch time. Hurdle work, static holds, pink. I do this every lunch hour at my first job while the rest of the jokers are heading to Burger King or surfing the net.
7:00pm Hurdle work, Red2 basics, Kettlebell swing, Kettlebell Snatch, Kettlebell cleans, step ups, bodyweight box squats, broomstick overhead squats, one legged kettlebell deadlifts, LPS, Pink and few other odds and ends (hey can't give away all the secrets, I need to eat too. You want to know those little odds or ends, perhaps learn some kettlebell training? Hire me, or buy the kettlebell dvd off the Renegadetraining website http://www.renegadetraining.com/kettlebell_dvd.html.) Like how I worked that plug in? Like I said I got to eat too buddy.
Tune-Age of the Day: Finally a DJ with some grapefruits. Working Man by Rush on the radio, not satellite at 12:35! GOOD TUNE!
Ah Grasshopper remember always: “Coordinate your forces so that there is a minimum conflict and maximum effect. One uses four ounces to deflect four thousand pounds.” I Ching #61
Friday, February 22, 2008
I am old!
Having just finished a workout that I can confidently say would flatten ANY person that belongs to my gym, regardless of sex or age, I feel old.
Yes I said it “I feel old!” Mark this date in your calendars my students for this is the first time I ever, ever, ever let such words creep out of my mouth.
Why would I utter such nonsense?
Could it be fatigue from hurdle work?
Perhaps two blocks of tumbling?
Please people this is a Renegader here.
Then you would guess it would have to be the three four minute rounds of rope work, right?
11 minute session of ladder drills?
5 rounds of GPP?
Oh, perhaps the one armed snatches with a barbell?
Pause squats?
Split jerk?
Pull ups?
No? Then it had to be the 30 min session of LPS followed by Pink, right?
Knees? Back?
Really people, I could have done it all again if I wanted, well except perhaps the LPS. Ah who am I kidding I could have went at it again with just a tiny bite to eat. No, I was not feeling old from any of these fantastic exercises separate or combined. In fact I felt really good, my nervous system was aflame! I felt old because of two words…….
Dippin Dots.
Yes you heard me, Dippin Dots!
WTF JJ? You suffer another concussion?
No concussion my friends just a run in with one of my power lifter friends.
There I am finishing up my stretches when in walks “Big Jeffy.” Think Westside folks, go ahead stereotype its okay. Think big Viking tattoo that looks to have been inked in a Russian prison plastered on his enormous arm.
“What do think of Dippin Dots?” No hello, no how are you? Have not seen you in weeks… When he is straight to the point, I know he is pissed. Here is where I show my age. I have not a clue what a Dippin Dot is. I am thinking some new performance enhancing drug, perhaps a type of infection, venereal disease (once you meet Big Jeffy you will understand).
“What’s a Dippin Dot?” I dare ask.
“Its ice cream, but not ice cream.”
“Huh?”
“It is fake ice cream that has been cryogenically frozen to resemble candy or something.”
“That sounds good. Like the stuff you get at the National Air and Space museum?”
“No, tiny beads. It sucks! Cold Stone Creamery closed and my kid really likes the cotton candy flavor so I took him to Dippin Dots tonight. I go in their and ask for cotton candy and the owner, this little Asian guy who does not speak English started dipping out these little skittle looking things. I kept asking him where was the ice cream and he kept saying “This ice cream, this ice cream.”
At this point I am on the ground laughing my ass off as big 300lb Jeff is recreating the argument he was having with the store owner. In walk two gym employees, one 22, the other 17. They hear the word Dippin Dots and both tell us how they love them and how great it was they just put a store in the mall too. That is two stores within a 3 mile radius. So Big Jeffy asks them:
“You like them better than real ice cream?”
“Yeah, they are so convenient. They’re great.” The 17 year old replied.
“Yes, regular ice cream messes my stomach up,” The 22 year old replied.
In walks a thirtyish female.
“You like Dippin Dots or regular Ice Cream?”
“Ice cream, I hate those stupid Dippin Dots.” She replies.
And so goes the poll.
In conclusion I can only surmise that only younglings like Dippin Dots, and if you don’t you must be old. I bet even our own Renegade Desert Cart, Grant, does not even like Dippin Dots.
Having no desire to taste a Dippin Dot, or still not really knowing what a Dippin Dot is I can only assume I am old.
Lesson of the day Grasshopper:
Get an attention span, screw convenience, and go get some real ice cream if the desire is that strong. Get some real homemade stuff made with real raw milk cream and organic sugar. Throw in some fresh peaches or strawberries and you will never have a desire for any thing like a Dippin Dot, Bryer’s, Ben and Jerry’s again. Get some raw milk yogurt while your at it, you won’t regret it.
Tune-age of the day: Hmm….David Lee Roth…. Ice Cream….???? If you can’t figure the tune of the day out then you are too young, go eat your Dippin Dots and get fat!
Yes I said it “I feel old!” Mark this date in your calendars my students for this is the first time I ever, ever, ever let such words creep out of my mouth.
Why would I utter such nonsense?
Could it be fatigue from hurdle work?
Perhaps two blocks of tumbling?
Please people this is a Renegader here.
Then you would guess it would have to be the three four minute rounds of rope work, right?
11 minute session of ladder drills?
5 rounds of GPP?
Oh, perhaps the one armed snatches with a barbell?
Pause squats?
Split jerk?
Pull ups?
No? Then it had to be the 30 min session of LPS followed by Pink, right?
Knees? Back?
Really people, I could have done it all again if I wanted, well except perhaps the LPS. Ah who am I kidding I could have went at it again with just a tiny bite to eat. No, I was not feeling old from any of these fantastic exercises separate or combined. In fact I felt really good, my nervous system was aflame! I felt old because of two words…….
Dippin Dots.
Yes you heard me, Dippin Dots!
WTF JJ? You suffer another concussion?
No concussion my friends just a run in with one of my power lifter friends.
There I am finishing up my stretches when in walks “Big Jeffy.” Think Westside folks, go ahead stereotype its okay. Think big Viking tattoo that looks to have been inked in a Russian prison plastered on his enormous arm.
“What do think of Dippin Dots?” No hello, no how are you? Have not seen you in weeks… When he is straight to the point, I know he is pissed. Here is where I show my age. I have not a clue what a Dippin Dot is. I am thinking some new performance enhancing drug, perhaps a type of infection, venereal disease (once you meet Big Jeffy you will understand).
“What’s a Dippin Dot?” I dare ask.
“Its ice cream, but not ice cream.”
“Huh?”
“It is fake ice cream that has been cryogenically frozen to resemble candy or something.”
“That sounds good. Like the stuff you get at the National Air and Space museum?”
“No, tiny beads. It sucks! Cold Stone Creamery closed and my kid really likes the cotton candy flavor so I took him to Dippin Dots tonight. I go in their and ask for cotton candy and the owner, this little Asian guy who does not speak English started dipping out these little skittle looking things. I kept asking him where was the ice cream and he kept saying “This ice cream, this ice cream.”
At this point I am on the ground laughing my ass off as big 300lb Jeff is recreating the argument he was having with the store owner. In walk two gym employees, one 22, the other 17. They hear the word Dippin Dots and both tell us how they love them and how great it was they just put a store in the mall too. That is two stores within a 3 mile radius. So Big Jeffy asks them:
“You like them better than real ice cream?”
“Yeah, they are so convenient. They’re great.” The 17 year old replied.
“Yes, regular ice cream messes my stomach up,” The 22 year old replied.
In walks a thirtyish female.
“You like Dippin Dots or regular Ice Cream?”
“Ice cream, I hate those stupid Dippin Dots.” She replies.
And so goes the poll.
In conclusion I can only surmise that only younglings like Dippin Dots, and if you don’t you must be old. I bet even our own Renegade Desert Cart, Grant, does not even like Dippin Dots.
Having no desire to taste a Dippin Dot, or still not really knowing what a Dippin Dot is I can only assume I am old.
Lesson of the day Grasshopper:
Get an attention span, screw convenience, and go get some real ice cream if the desire is that strong. Get some real homemade stuff made with real raw milk cream and organic sugar. Throw in some fresh peaches or strawberries and you will never have a desire for any thing like a Dippin Dot, Bryer’s, Ben and Jerry’s again. Get some raw milk yogurt while your at it, you won’t regret it.
Tune-age of the day: Hmm….David Lee Roth…. Ice Cream….???? If you can’t figure the tune of the day out then you are too young, go eat your Dippin Dots and get fat!
Oh and for the record I never said the "Old" word aloud, so just erase that mark of the calendar.
Tuesday, February 19, 2008
Bruised Brain pt3
Overtop crushed stone and some 50 odd years of trash I ran, cold wind shrinking my manhood through a growing rent in my jeans and dew soaking my socks with every stride. I remember it being cold, real cold. I remember beating on the emergency door on the opposite side of the arena, next to the heels locker room and telling whoever opened it “Tell Mozart I forgot the whole f’n match!” I remember running back around the building, but not ever re-entering. All faded to black.
Hamburg Fieldhouse is nothing more than a giant airplane hanger (what airplane hanger is not giant I wonder). I know your thinking it is some grand arena by the legendary names I threw out in part one, and it is in a nostalgic kind of way, but in reality is nothing more than a 20,000 square foot airplane hanger built in the 50’s with a kitchen/concession stand on one end, a small lobby and two locker rooms on the other with bleachers in between.
Don’t get me wrong I love the place, the lighting and sound were perfect as was the crowd, but here is the significance to me giving you such background: The locker rooms were separated by the lobby. That meant no communication between the heels (bad guys) and faces (good guys) once the doors to the public were opened.
“So what?” you say? Well, the key to surviving wrestling and putting on a great show is communication, both before and during a match. Generally speaking I break down pro-wrestling into three type of matches:
A Shoot: Every wrestler comes upon these, as have I. A shoot is every bit as real as the UFC and potentially more dangerous. Shoots usually occur when opponents have genuine animosity towards each other, or one has too big an ego and does not believe he should do the job, or you are put in a match with a complete buffoon who knows nothing of what he is doing and deserves to be taught a lesson before he hurts you. The only difference between a Pro-Wrestling shoot match and the UFC is you try and make it appear as if it is a scripted match. In a shoot chances are one of you is leaving bloodied, battered, and possibly with broken bones. Just follow some of Kurt Angle’s earlier matches in the WWE where every veteran thought to test him.
Spot Fest: This is exactly what it sounds, no story line, no thought, no artistic talent. Basically it is two opponents just going out and doing moves equivalent to a high pace training session with each wrestler trying to get in as many of his specialty moves as possible. This is increasingly common today, especially among the Indies and has developed a whole cult following known as “smart marks.” It is more a backyard style and frowned upon by traditionalists. These wrestlers, though extremely athletic and talented, rarely last long in the business or advance.
Traditional: Here you have a match where you try to get a story across, one that usually follows the standard arc found in most books. You start with an exposition, move to a conflict, encounter complications, hit the climax, find a resolution and then a conclusion. Each match then contributes to another plot consisting of beginning, middle and end. These plots can last a couple of shows or if they are really well done nearly a year. Generally you go in with an outline of what you want to do and alter it as needed on feedback by the crowd. The story is what is important, not getting in all the moves you can and making yourself look good. These types of matches are becoming increasingly hard to pull off as the public’s attention spans are dwindling.
Some wrestlers like to plan out the entire match move for move, sequence after sequence. However, most script only beginning sequences and the finish and call the match on the fly. In other words if we take an 8 minute match the first minute is planned as is the last. The other 6 minutes are made up as you go with an attempt to fill the premise of your story. Ideally if you have anything out of the ordinary you want to include in the match you of coarse let your opponent know ahead of time by walking through it. Again, survival by communication. You do not want to get a broken neck because of lack of communication. Unfortunately this is not always possible.
Both my matches for this show, as are all my matches, were traditional matches. Each had a specific story line set and meant to outline the next several shows spanning over a few months. It was imperative that we fulfill these story lines otherwise find ourselves curtain jerking. In this case we had these matches entirely scripted out due to our inexperience in the business at the time. This was of course a mistake. It is hard enough remembering one match let alone two or three as I never possessed a great memory. A harsh lesson learned.
I wish I could tell you more, but that is all I remember of that night, strange as it might seem. I can tell you the match went flawlessly and it went exactly as we planned several hours beforehand despite my concussion. Several wrestlers, fans, and owners told me it was the best match I had ever had to date. It even received a write up and a picture in one of the magazines. Here is a quote from the magazine that stands out “In the eleventh match, JJ Johnson defeated Mozart Fontaine. Making his singles debut was the pompous Mozart Fontaine who was brought to the ring by the manager of the Box Office, E.S. Easton. Johnson was relentless in his attack on Fontaine and when Easton attempted to get involved his interference backfired and gave JJ the win.”
I guess I did okay. All that training paid off and allowed me to perform to perfection under duress. Of course the majority of credit goes to my opponent Mozart Fontaine who took control of the match and made sure the plot was fulfilled. He could easily have shot on me, but was the ever consummate professional. He might not be the model of physical perfection, but the guy is definitely skilled in the ring. His ability to remain calm in the face of adversity allowed our match to flow perfectly.
As for the final match of the night….I have no idea? All I came home with was a bloody pair of jeans with a giant rip through the crotch. I sure hope I had clean underwear on that night. Still do not know whatever happened to my gym bag and street clothes.
And that my friend is what happens when you get a concussion. Hoped you enjoyed the story, and yes it is true.
Your lesson for this day Grasshopper:
Train to perform under duress.
Train to overcome adversity.
Train not to look good but to perform to perfection when conditions are not perfect.
Train Renegade.
Hamburg Fieldhouse is nothing more than a giant airplane hanger (what airplane hanger is not giant I wonder). I know your thinking it is some grand arena by the legendary names I threw out in part one, and it is in a nostalgic kind of way, but in reality is nothing more than a 20,000 square foot airplane hanger built in the 50’s with a kitchen/concession stand on one end, a small lobby and two locker rooms on the other with bleachers in between.
Don’t get me wrong I love the place, the lighting and sound were perfect as was the crowd, but here is the significance to me giving you such background: The locker rooms were separated by the lobby. That meant no communication between the heels (bad guys) and faces (good guys) once the doors to the public were opened.
“So what?” you say? Well, the key to surviving wrestling and putting on a great show is communication, both before and during a match. Generally speaking I break down pro-wrestling into three type of matches:
A Shoot: Every wrestler comes upon these, as have I. A shoot is every bit as real as the UFC and potentially more dangerous. Shoots usually occur when opponents have genuine animosity towards each other, or one has too big an ego and does not believe he should do the job, or you are put in a match with a complete buffoon who knows nothing of what he is doing and deserves to be taught a lesson before he hurts you. The only difference between a Pro-Wrestling shoot match and the UFC is you try and make it appear as if it is a scripted match. In a shoot chances are one of you is leaving bloodied, battered, and possibly with broken bones. Just follow some of Kurt Angle’s earlier matches in the WWE where every veteran thought to test him.
Spot Fest: This is exactly what it sounds, no story line, no thought, no artistic talent. Basically it is two opponents just going out and doing moves equivalent to a high pace training session with each wrestler trying to get in as many of his specialty moves as possible. This is increasingly common today, especially among the Indies and has developed a whole cult following known as “smart marks.” It is more a backyard style and frowned upon by traditionalists. These wrestlers, though extremely athletic and talented, rarely last long in the business or advance.
Traditional: Here you have a match where you try to get a story across, one that usually follows the standard arc found in most books. You start with an exposition, move to a conflict, encounter complications, hit the climax, find a resolution and then a conclusion. Each match then contributes to another plot consisting of beginning, middle and end. These plots can last a couple of shows or if they are really well done nearly a year. Generally you go in with an outline of what you want to do and alter it as needed on feedback by the crowd. The story is what is important, not getting in all the moves you can and making yourself look good. These types of matches are becoming increasingly hard to pull off as the public’s attention spans are dwindling.
Some wrestlers like to plan out the entire match move for move, sequence after sequence. However, most script only beginning sequences and the finish and call the match on the fly. In other words if we take an 8 minute match the first minute is planned as is the last. The other 6 minutes are made up as you go with an attempt to fill the premise of your story. Ideally if you have anything out of the ordinary you want to include in the match you of coarse let your opponent know ahead of time by walking through it. Again, survival by communication. You do not want to get a broken neck because of lack of communication. Unfortunately this is not always possible.
Both my matches for this show, as are all my matches, were traditional matches. Each had a specific story line set and meant to outline the next several shows spanning over a few months. It was imperative that we fulfill these story lines otherwise find ourselves curtain jerking. In this case we had these matches entirely scripted out due to our inexperience in the business at the time. This was of course a mistake. It is hard enough remembering one match let alone two or three as I never possessed a great memory. A harsh lesson learned.
I wish I could tell you more, but that is all I remember of that night, strange as it might seem. I can tell you the match went flawlessly and it went exactly as we planned several hours beforehand despite my concussion. Several wrestlers, fans, and owners told me it was the best match I had ever had to date. It even received a write up and a picture in one of the magazines. Here is a quote from the magazine that stands out “In the eleventh match, JJ Johnson defeated Mozart Fontaine. Making his singles debut was the pompous Mozart Fontaine who was brought to the ring by the manager of the Box Office, E.S. Easton. Johnson was relentless in his attack on Fontaine and when Easton attempted to get involved his interference backfired and gave JJ the win.”
I guess I did okay. All that training paid off and allowed me to perform to perfection under duress. Of course the majority of credit goes to my opponent Mozart Fontaine who took control of the match and made sure the plot was fulfilled. He could easily have shot on me, but was the ever consummate professional. He might not be the model of physical perfection, but the guy is definitely skilled in the ring. His ability to remain calm in the face of adversity allowed our match to flow perfectly.
As for the final match of the night….I have no idea? All I came home with was a bloody pair of jeans with a giant rip through the crotch. I sure hope I had clean underwear on that night. Still do not know whatever happened to my gym bag and street clothes.
And that my friend is what happens when you get a concussion. Hoped you enjoyed the story, and yes it is true.
Your lesson for this day Grasshopper:
Train to perform under duress.
Train to overcome adversity.
Train not to look good but to perform to perfection when conditions are not perfect.
Train Renegade.
Wednesday, February 13, 2008
Bruised Brain Pt.2
The puddle of sweat grows outward upon the aged concrete. For some reason it fascinates me, just as it did on the hardwood. There I sit on the narrow bench sucking the blood from a broken lip and staring at sweat.How would you describe the taste of blood? Think about it.
The foul smell of greasy chicken and pierogis fill one nostril. The stench of passing fast food fills the other along with the cursed smell of Hot Stuff that plagues every locker room. I could get up and flee the foulness, make my way out of the concrete block prison to the curtain like the other wrestlers, but there I sit staring at that damn puddle of sweat surrounded by concrete blocks peeling 50 years of paint. To my right is a sink, a urinal and of course an occupied stall. The stall is always occupied in the locker rooms of sporting events it seems. Before me a shower drips, it is where the doctor usually does his stitching. For once I don’t need stitches, except my pants which are without a crotch. To my left is another bench lined with wrestler’s gym bags, spray bottles of water, oil, and that f’n Hot Stuff! The room is no more than 15x15 and old, real old.
“JJ, Yo JJ” The voice is that of Boogie Woogie Brown. There he sits, all 370 pounds of him, in the center of what has been named the “Faces” locker room on a stool made for a first grader. He is wearing nothing but green weenie benders (yes the same as in the pic) and licking his fingers while juggling a clipboard along with a white Styrofoam carton of chicken and pierogis. I don’t even know what the hell a pierogi is or how to spell it, but Boogie Woogie Brown it is not a pleasant site to behold at the moment. Yet I remember him sitting on that tiny stool clear as me staring at these words I type, just as I remember the pool of sweat and confliction of smells.
“Hey you okay? You need the Doc?” I can’t tell you what I replied but the next words I remember were “Your up next.”
“Next?”
How can the end of match 7 become the beginning of match 10 in the blink of an eye? With a concussion that’s how. Generally speaking the average wrestling match is about 8 minutes long, add in entrances and such and your looking at roughly 15 minutes. Somehow 30+ minutes passed with me just staring at a puddle of sweat and no one asking otherwise. The "Doc" was ofcoarse out enjoying the show.
“Match 11, that’s you brother.”
“Who am I wrestling?”
“Mozart, you sure you okay?” I am only guessing at how the conversation went as my next memory is of me sneaking out the curtain and bolting out the emergency door in a sprint with the hopes of no one seeing….
Oh No! Did our hero succumb to the pressure? Will our hero be named a coward? Where did he go minutes before his match? Did he come back? What happens to a person with a concussion as he confronts adversity?
Stay tuned kiddies your questions will be answered along with some “secrets” of the business in our next exciting episode. Same Bat time, Same Bat Channel.
Ahh Grasshopper did you really read the passage from the ancient Book of Change? I mean really read it? Read it again, contemplate it and then we shall proceed with your training.
“The superior man respectfully appreciates the cycles of increase and decrease…. External ploys will not put an end to the natural cycle of deterioration. Time Will. Nurture your mind and body… Look for wisdom in your acceptance of the times.” I Ching #23
Tune-age of the day: I see no one killed the rooster it is playing on the radio. Good thing, because it is one of my favorites.
Friday, February 8, 2008
Bruised Brain
A puddle of sweat or perhaps it is blood, I can not tell, rapidly turns into a lake beneath my head. It is hot, just like the air I am trying to breathe through lungs that just will not quite fill. My eyes are closed and opening them would only result in seeing strands of hair, my hair, and that pool of blood, but it is still not yet time. Instead I work on getting my lungs to right themselves and envision the stain my soul is forever adding among the thousands of others upon the aged hardwood floor of the Hamburg Fieldhouse. I could be laying just where Superstar Billy Grahm, Nikoli Volkoff, Bruno Sammartino, Zbysko, Blassi, Backlund, Rogers, shall I go on? had once laid. Cool.“Okay what’s next?” I think to myself running the next several sequences I want to attempt through my head. The pace will be fast, time short. “I really want to get that Russian Leg Sweep and Slingshot Suplex in, but how?After the moonsault? Perfect I will have him throw me in, work me to a corner, reverse and then hit him with the Russian leg sweep. Do I go for a pin or submission with the octopus? What will the fans buy?”
Slowly I open my eyes and stagger to my feet finding my opponent nowhere in sight. That’s good. The hundreds of fans are shouting, urging me on, urging me to turn around. “JJ, JJ, JJ….” This is good too, as they are into the match. We are doing exactly what we wanted. The crowd is in the palm of our hands. I let the drama build, take a few steps like I am drunk before flicking the hair from out of my eyes and slowly turning around. Too late, or just right depending on your point of view. Fast Eddie is already airborne from the top rope. All I see is a blur of black and gold tights, a trace of blond hair and an extremely hairy chest. No one can forget that chest I assure you. I reach outward in self defense and the next image is that of a size 12 boot slamming me in the jaw followed by a flash of light. Downward I travel the hardwood floor meets my skull and another bright light fills the darkness.
I would love to finish, but that is all I remember. That is what happens when you get a concussion. Sometimes you remember bits and pieces, most of the time nothing. I did continue to wrestle and finish the match which remarkably went on for another four minutes. Eventually I did lose thanks to my opponent’s personal groomer/manager Sebastion Night’s interference. I have been told was a phenomenal match, I even have pictures and yes that was “The Moonsault” you see. I guess I have to take their word for the rest of those four minutes. I am sure it was a great finish, with Fast Eddie I have no doubt it was epic.
This blog was inspired by a recent post on Prosource.net pertaining to a CBC medical report on multiple concussions among athletes of which I have had plenty.
But wait this is not the end of the story. Oh no this was only match #7 on a 12 match card. I was also scheduled to wrestle match #11 and #12 too!
Stay tuned kiddies to see how the mighty Ring Crew Guy fared. Did he wrestle? Was he rushed to the hospital? What happened on that night of non stop action? Same Bat channel, same Bat time.
Ahh Grasshopper you have returned for more training. Contemplate this: “The superior man respectfully appreciates the cycles of increase and decrease…. External ploys will not put an end to the natural cycle of deterioration. Time Will. Nurture your mind and body… Look for wisdom in your acceptance of the times.” I Ching #23
Tune-age of the day: AIC, Can anyone kill the rooster?
Monday, February 4, 2008
#1 Beverage for the Year
And the beverage of choice for this year is……You did not really think I was going to make it that easy did you? What fun is the “kill” without the “hunt”? None!
Let us get to the hunt.
This year marked the 10th annual Superbowl party at Casa de JJ. This is my one party for the year I throw. I save a hundred bucks a month to cover the cost and make sure it is done right. No second rate party here. I also plan one special project to be done. In years past it has been re-finishing the basement, building a bar, buying a grill, refrigerator, ect… you get the point.
Over the past few years I have been fascinated at what the beverage of choice will be among my friends and family as it changes. Lately anticipating this trend has become a bit of an enigma. I do not know what to buy? Believe me I stock the fridge and bar to the max and have more than enough food just look at the pic’s. I usually average about forty people, this year the number hit sixty.
The menu for this year was Arizona themed so that meant Tex Mex. We’ll get to the food in the next blog and stick to beverages. As you can see the fridge is stocked and if you look close on the second shelf next the “Lite” is some good ole “Pabst” I keep this on hand incase Grant or the Coach finally decide to drop buy as they have refined tastes.
Going into the night I thought the favorites would mirror the 2006 Superbowl:
Dr. Pepper #1
Yuengling #2
Sprite #3
Water #4
Hard Liquor:
Yagermeister #1
Bicardi Orange #2
This year I made sure I had extra of each of the above, along with
Molson, Sam Adams, Sam Adams light, Bud, Rolling Rock, Heineken, Pabst Blue Ribbon, Lite, Smirnoff Ice Raspberry, Coke regular & diet, 7up, Dr. Pepper diet & berries and cream & another flavor ??, Mt. Dew regular and Code Red, Orange Crush, Ice tea, Seagram’s and few I can’t remember (I don’t drink soda’s at all), In addition to having 5 cases of water.
Winner of the 2007 Superbowl of beverages:
Dr. Pepper “Berries and Cream” #1
Coke regular #2
Water #3.
Smirnoff Ice Raspberry #4
Miller Lite #5
Molson #6
Hard Liquor:
Black Haas, Yagermeister, Goldshlager
Observations: Liquor did not seem in vogue this year. Not too many shots as compared to past years despite having several designated drivers ready to spring into action. Could it be because I did not get an Ice Luge carved for this year? Nah, I think it was because everyone has to get up early for work and a few of my heavy drinkers were not feeling well. Maybe they should move the Superbowl to Saturday? Hey I am not complaining as I do not need to replenish my bar for next year. The Lite beer thing I just do not get. Why not drink water instead?
Smirnoff Ice? Well they are quite tasty, but the beverage of the “Crewguy” was Molson Canadian. Hey I could not make the Renegade Seminar in Canada so I brought a piece of Canada to me, plus its really good beer.
But hey look Water made it to number 3, a jump from last year. Perhaps it can rise to #2 and then #1…..yeah right and the Eagles may finally win a Superbowl. Oh and Grant, the Pabst Blue Ribbon remained untouched, it will be there for you next year.
Wednesday, January 30, 2008
"A Beginning"
Many things roll around in this big head of mine, but seldom do any make it to print. Why?
Lack of Confidence? Nah.
Aging Brain? Nah.
Busy schedule? Warm.
Purging of old ideas for new? Warmer.
Just plain lazy? Ooh, red hot. Yeah, that is probably the best answer I can give.
So what do Renegade Training followers do about laziness and weakness? We attack and destroy such negativity. We turn weakness into strength. This pertains to the mind as well as the body.
The JJCREWGUY blog will be my attack upon laziness of the brain, my brain to be exact. I won’t guarantee a daily entry, but will do my best to make a couple entries a week. Who knows were this blog will take us. All great stories have a beginning. Since my beginning has long been set in motion this, as Robert Jordan would have said, is “A beginning.”
No worries we’ll piece the other beginning as we roll, as well as my trips to “The Farm”, “The Market”, the latest characters at the gym, my adventures in Pro Wrestling past and present, my current book project, surfing expeditions, skating mishaps, as well as promoting my personal training business (hey I got to eat too.)
Buckle up for a wild ride.
Thought of the day Grasshopper.
“In the Natural Law some lose and in this way profit.” Tao Te Ching #42
Lack of Confidence? Nah.
Aging Brain? Nah.
Busy schedule? Warm.
Purging of old ideas for new? Warmer.
Just plain lazy? Ooh, red hot. Yeah, that is probably the best answer I can give.
So what do Renegade Training followers do about laziness and weakness? We attack and destroy such negativity. We turn weakness into strength. This pertains to the mind as well as the body.
The JJCREWGUY blog will be my attack upon laziness of the brain, my brain to be exact. I won’t guarantee a daily entry, but will do my best to make a couple entries a week. Who knows were this blog will take us. All great stories have a beginning. Since my beginning has long been set in motion this, as Robert Jordan would have said, is “A beginning.”
No worries we’ll piece the other beginning as we roll, as well as my trips to “The Farm”, “The Market”, the latest characters at the gym, my adventures in Pro Wrestling past and present, my current book project, surfing expeditions, skating mishaps, as well as promoting my personal training business (hey I got to eat too.)
Buckle up for a wild ride.
Thought of the day Grasshopper.
“In the Natural Law some lose and in this way profit.” Tao Te Ching #42
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