Riddle me this... Why do I wrestle? pt.2

“Wham!”
“Oomph!”
“Pow!”
“Kaboom!”
Darkness momentarily settles atop the brilliant flashes light.
No, Adam West is not about to appear and save the day. Neither is his sidekick Burt Ward. This is not the 60’s but rather Saturday March 1, 2008 and I am laying on my back seeing stars. While I do have a nifty Goth like belt holding up my leather pants it is certainly no “Utility Belt” and most definitely does not hold any “Anti-Mega Spray” or “Anti Shark Repellant.” This unfortunately is what happens when an angry 6’8” 400lb man nails you with a size 15 boot. You see stars and think your in some wacky episode of the original Batman. You also think “this was not in the plan.”
Checking my jaw to make sure it is not broken I craw to the ropes, it is the only way I am going to get back to my feet and make a tag. I pull myself up and “Wham!”
A fist greets my chin. Off I go into the ropes opposite. The ropes stretch and then I am shot like a marble leaving a wrist rocket into the waiting boot of Mega, yet again. This time I go down hard and think “Eccentric, Concentric” for some odd reason. Don’t know what I am talking about? Your not Renegade then.
It is just a matter of breaths before all 400lbs comes crashing upon my chest. I like my ribs, I really do. By some miracle, my manager Sebastian Night is up on the ring apron. Now he looks like he just came out of an episode of Batman, some sort of genetic mutation of the Joker, Penguin and the Riddler all in one. And yes the Riddler was the coolest!
Mega sees him and promptly forgets about breaking some ribs. I sure as hell am not going anywhere. As Mega grabs Sebastian and delivers a drawn out thunderous punch a cane magically slides before me. I grab the cane and struggle to my feet with its aid. The behemoth turns….
“Wham!” Into his gut I drive the cane with all I got. By my side Burt Ward appears and motions for the neck. Around the neck I wrap my arm. “Go,” he shouts and into the canvas we both drive Mega’s head.
“Who sucks now?” I yell to the crowd before hi-fiving my partner. The crowd most definately thinks I still do. I turn for the cover, and…..”Splat!” The Beast clotheslines both me and my sidekick at a dead run. He is pissed!
We just spent a good 5 minutes beating him down with an arsenal of offensive maneuvers and he is making up for all of it in one move. Over the top rope and onto the hard gym floor I crash nearly atop my fallen manager. A breath later, the Beast is falling atop me having been dumped by the team of Trouble, and Robere.
One, two, three! Our Victory, our number one contender slot, our chance at gold, stolen in a heartbeat by a pair of 150 lb wimps! A victory so cheesy, so unbelievable, it could only be an episode of the original Batman! No, not the movie kiddies! The TV show!
This is why I wrestle.

Ah Grasshopper riddle me this from 1966:
“What is always coming, but never arrives?
Quickly, Quickly!”

“........Tomorrow. For when it arrives it is today, and today my dear rodents, should prove to be most memorable!” The Riddler, Frank Goshin, 1966?

Ah much too easy Grasshopper. Try another.

“There were three men in a boat with four cigarettes and no matches. How did they manage to smoke?” Asks the Riddler.
“They threw the cigarette overboard and made the boat a CIGARETTE LIGHTER!” Come on Grasshopper, if Robin got it in 1966 you should have too!

Is this the end of the riddles? Will our hero ever get the titles? Did you have to cheat? Do you know what eccentric and concentric mean now?
Answers tomorrow…same Bat time….same Bat channel.